Driving in Las Vegas

Jalál (Glory), 1 Kalimát (Words), 170 BE – Saturday, July 13, 2013 about 2:59 PM Pacific Daylight Time

I went to the bank this morning to deposit a check at the ATM. I noticed three different cars doing things they should not have done, but there were no traffic officers to catch them. I know that the patrol cars cannot be every place at once. I know that the police do the best they can, so we drivers must be on the lookout and drive defensively.

The driver of the first car had a dog in the car with her. The dog was sticking its head out of the driver’s side window and she had a hold of its collar attempting to keep the dog from jumping out of the car. I do not know if she was wearing a seat belt, I do know dog should have been in the backseat with a seat belt on. I think you can get seat belts for dogs at anyone of the pet stores.

The driver of the second car ran a red light from the left turn lane. He did not turn left, but instead through that lane and ran the light going south on Maryland Parkway. All the cars in the other lanes were stopped waiting for the light to change, which it was about to do. However, the driver of the fast car apparently did not want to wait or (giving him the benefit of the doubt) did not have working breaks.

The driver of the third car was going west on Oakey Street and made a left turn from the wrong lane. I was in the turn lane waiting for the light to change and the driver of the third car was to my left in a lane that is not a turn lane. When the light turned green I he put on the gas and turn across three lanes of Maryland Parkway in front of me. Fortunately, he was faster at getting his foot off the brake and onto the gas.

It is unusual to witness three different poor driving incidents in one trip. I am glad that I said a prayer of protection before I backed out of my garage for the drive to the bank. I am going to continue saying a prayer of protection before backing out of my garage.

Clouds over Las Vegas

Istiqlál (Independence), 19 Rahmat (Mercy), 170 BE – Friday, July 12, 2013 about 4:30 PM Pacific Daylight Time

white clouds hide blue sky
humidity is rising
triple digit temperatures

Monsoonal Moisture and Triple Digit Temperatures

Fidál (Grace), 16 Rahmat (Mercy), 170 BE – Tuesday, July 9, 2013 about 3:30 PM Pacific Daylight Time

I drove to the Baha’i Center about 11:30 this morning. There was a partial cloud cover, which seemed to cool the temperature. I do not have a working air conditioner in my car, so I have to drive with one window down. Driving to the west side of town was comfortable and pleasant.

Today was the Commemoration of the Martyrdom of the Bab. During the program consisted of prayers, a biography of the Bab, videos were shown, and a lunch was served. The lunch consisted of sandwiches, potato salad, vegetables, and desert. I left about around 1:30 pm and drove directly back to the house.

As I drove back, to the east side of Las Vegas I noticed the heat and the humidity more then I did earlier. Of course, it was afternoon and that is when the temperatures rise into the triple digits. The clouds had started to move out of the valley, I noticed more close to the mountains then I did above the valley. Still the humidity made the drive home a little uncomfortable. I think I will have to roll down another window when I drive the car in the afternoon.

Thunderstorm Sunday in Las Vegas

Jamál (Beauty), 14 Rahmat (Mercy), 170 BE – Sunday, July 7, 2013 about 10:23 AM Pacific Daylight Time

We had a small thunderstorm her in Las Vegas, I did not see any lightning, but I did hear thunder and see rain, so I suppose lightning occurred. I turned off the computers, fixed myself breakfast, and sat down on the couch to compose blog entries during the storm. It has stopped raining and I do not hear any more thunder; I think the storm has passed. I will finish this entry and my breakfast before posting this to my blog.

As I look out my window, I can see the limbs of the neighbors’ oak trees waving. I can also see patches of blue sky between the clouds, so it may not rain in my neighborhood any more today. Since I do not hear any thunder grumbling, I am going to put more ice in my coffee and go back to the computers.

I enjoyed the little bit of rain. The rain was gentle and there was not enough of it to flood the area. There could be flash flood warnings for the Las Vegas area, but unless were get more rain I doubt that we have to worry about the flood problem today. I will have to check the local news later to find out if it rained on Mount Charleston or in the canyons surrounding it. They could use some rain up there to help extinguish the Carpenter Canyon fire.

A Doctor’s Appointment This Afternoon

Istiqlál (Independence), 12 Rahmat (Mercy), 170 BE – Friday, July 5, 2013 about 10:20 PM Pacific Daylight Time

I have a doctor’s appointment this afternoon. I need a refill on one of my meds and I have to have a blood test before I get the refill. I know I should have called at the end of last week or the beginning of this week, but I did not call. I know I am fortunate to get an appointment to see the doctor in that quickly.

I also know that I am attempting to write this entry while I am yawning. Since I need to be wide-awake before I drive to the doctor’s office, I am going to close this now. Perhaps it would help if I ate a sandwich or something like that.

Evening on the Fourth of July: A Poem

Weariness sits in,
I yawn,
but I am not planning to sleep.

It is the Fourth of July,
Independence Day,
time to celebrate America's birthday.

I listen
as the celebration begins
with booms,
bangs,
cracks,
and pops.

I smile,
I laugh,
remembering my childhood;
the celebration has not changed
in the last 66 years,
we still commemorate
with noise abandon
and sparkling sky rockets.

Happy Birthday U.S.A.

 

Midweek Reflections: What I have learned about my depression

‘Idál (Justice), 10 Rahmat (Mercy), 170 BE – Wednesday, July 3, 2013 about 11:18 AM Pacific Daylight Time

July 3, 2013 and the year is half over. There are only a few more months until my birthday and I turn 67. I have to begin making some changes in my life and my attitude. It seems to me that I have spent the last six months depressed; however, I know that is not true.

I know that there have been hours, days, and weeks during the past six months that the depression did not rear its ugly head. I have learned that if I get out of the house, especially during the daylight hours I am less depressed.

I know that worry adds to my depression and that prayer helps alleviate the worry. When I put a situation in God’s hands, I worry less and therefore am less depressed. I also know that taking action on a situation alleviates my worry, which helps disperse the darkness and negative thoughts that indicate I am depressed.

Another thing that helps assuage my depression is writing. It does not seem to matter what I write because focusing on the words takes my focus off my depression and worries. It also helps to write about what I am worried about, which I do in my off line journal.

One Test After Another

Fiḍál (Grace), 9 Raḥmat (Mercy), 170 BE - Monday, July 1, 2013 about 9:10 PM Pacific Time

Extreme heat warnings and triple digit temperatures are bad enough, but now my cell phone doesn't work. It worked this morning, but this evening it is dark. I can't make any calls and when I put it on the charger it doesn't respond. I call customer service (on the land line) and was told there was a three hour wait. I, therefore, went to the website and sent an e-mail. I will try customer service again in the morning.

It is just one test after another. The triple digit temperatures, I can handle or at least tolerate. The extreme heat warnings, I can deal with, as long as I remain hydrated and can find a cool place in the afternoon. I am not sure what I will do without a cell phone. I know that I spent years without one. I know that I have a land line, so I am not cut off from the world.

The cell phone has become a part of me. It is an extension of who I am. Perhaps I have become too dependent on it. It has all my contact numbers, which I did not back up in another document. If the numbers are still in the phone's memory when I get it working again, if I get it working again. In the meantime, I will send e-mails to everyone reminding them of the land line number and asking them for their phone numbers.

Sunday June 30, 2013 in Las Vegas

Jamál (Beauty), 7 Raḥmat (Mercy), 170 BE - Sunday, June 30, 2013 about 10:35 AM Pacific Daylight Time

Sunday Thoughts

1.  Morning clouds disperse as temperatures rise
2. Morning clouds disappear as the wind blows
3. Another triple digit day
4. Extreme heat warning continues
5. Las Vegas suffers under 115 plus temperatures
6. Remember to say cool or indoors
7. Remember to drink plenty of liquids
8. Remember to drink plenty of water
9. I am a survivor

Thankful Thursday, June 27, 2013

Istiqlál (Independence), 5 Rahmat (Mercy), 170 BE – Thursday, June 27, 2013 after sunset Pacific Daylight Time

Today I am thankful...

1. ... for iced coffee in a tall glass. I make my iced coffee by pouring a cup of hot coffee over coffee ice cubes. When I have leftover coffee, I heat it up in the microwave.
2. ... that I received a container of milk with the June senior commodities, which I picked up on Wednesday morning.
3. ... that I received a small jar of peanut butter with the June senior commodities.
4. ... that I received two bottles of juice with the senior commodities. I received a bottle of apple juice in one bag and a bottle of grape juice in the other.
5. ... that I saw a neighbor’s cat dozing in my backyard. I went into to kitchen to make a glass of coffee and when I looked out the window the cat was lying their. She (I think the cat is a she) raised her head to look at a bird.
6. ... that I was able to purchase an individual watermelon when I went to the 99¢ store this morning. This is my first watermelon of 2013.
7. ... that I learned a new word when I read Jane Ann  Morrison’s column in today’s edition of the Las Vegas Review-Journal. The word I learned is soporific, which refers to something that causes sleep or lethargy.
8. ... that the 99¢ store, on the corner of East Charleston and Maryland Parkway in Las Vegas, opens at 7:00 AM. I can get in and out before the temperatures here hit triple digits.
9. ... that I do not have a bathtub in this house. Instead of a bath, I have to take a shower. I have osteoarthritis in my knees and it is impossible for me to get out of a tub by myself.
10. ... that I received a get well card from a friend today.

Midweek Reflections on Peanut Butter and Grilled Cheese Sandwiches

‘Idál (Justice), 3 Rahmat (Mercy), 170 BE – Wednesday, June 26, 2013 about 7:03 PM Pacific Daylight Time

I picked up my senior food allotment for June. Included in the two bags were peanut butter and a package of American cheese. I almost have all the ingredients for a peanut butter or grilled cheese sandwich. I lack only one ingredient and that is the bread.

I did not get bread this morning because the place where I get the free bread does not open until 9:00 am. I picked up the two bags of food just after 8:00 this morning. Since there was cheese and a container of milk in the bags, I decided to come home. I did not want to let the perishables sit in the car while I was waiting for the other place to open.

I have to get bread tomorrow so that I can have a sandwich. I believe I will go to the 99¢ store in the morning. I think that store opens around 8:00 or 8:30, so I can get to the store and back home before it gets too hot. Then I can have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich or I can make a grilled cheese sandwich. I have eaten a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in almost three weeks. I did have a grilled cheese sandwich last week.

While I am at the 99¢ store, I need to purchase some coffee filters and see what kind of coffee they have. I am almost out of coffee and I will not be able to purchase any until about July 3. The 99¢ store may only have instant coffee, but that will do in a pinch. The important item right now is to bury a loaf or two of bread because I cannot have any type of sandwich without bread.

Saturday is Recyclable Pick Up

Fidál (Grace), 2 Rahmat (Mercy), 170 BE – Tuesday, June 25, 2013 about 6:09 PM Pacific Daylight Time

Saturday is the day recyclables picked up day in my neighborhood. Because I forgot to take the recyclables out the last two times, I have a two recyclable bins of newspapers. I do not have many cans or glass bottle, but I have a great many newspapers.

I have to make sure I have all of them out of the house and into the recyclable bins by Saturday. Then on either Friday night or Saturday morning, I have to carry the bins to the curb. The problem is a plastic bin full of papers is heavier then one full of cans or glass.

I know my left shoulder is going to give me problems. I have issues with the rotator cuff and carrying heavy items like a recyclable bin full of newspapers is not a good idea. Good idea or not, I have to get the bins to the curb this week, other wise the newspapers will just stack up.

Perhaps I can drag or push the bins to the curb instead of carrying them. I do not think it would be easier to get them to the curb, but it may prevent me from injuring my rotator cuff again. I will have to think about which method is easiest and safest.

Monday Morning in Las Vegas

Kamál (Perfection), 1 Rahmat (Mercy), 170 BE – Monday, June 24, 2013 about 8:35 AM Pacific Time

Last night, despite the fact that it was partly cloudy, I saw the full moon. I took some trash to the garage and while I was out there, I looked up at the moon. The moon, brighter then normal, was shining through a break in the clouds. When I returned to the house, I started a poem. This morning I started another poem about the super moon because I was dissatisfied about the three lines I wrote last night.

supper moon shining
across the Las Vegas night
beautiful evening

There is still a cloud cover this morning, but it does not seem to bother the birds. When I went out to take the kitchen trash to the garage and pick up my paper, I heard a nightingale sing. As I look out my window, I see the morning sun reflecting off my garage and the fender of my car. Perhaps the day will be sunny after all.

good morning sunshine
nightingales greet morning
partly cloudy day

I have finished my first cup of warmed over morning coffee. It is time to post this entry and get on with something else. I still need to take some recyclable to the garage before it gets too hot, which makes me want to remain indoors.

Summer Solstice 2013

Istiqlál (Independence), 17 Núr (Light), 170 BE – Friday, June 21, 2013 about 3:45 PM Pacific Daylight Time

summer solstice heat

triple digit temperatures

partly cloudy day

It is a beautiful partly cloudy afternoon in Las Vegas. Summer solstice always brings to mind watermelons and swimming. I do not intend to go swimming because I do not have a swimsuit, but I will purchase a watermelon next time I go to the grocery store.

summer solstice heat

an ice cold watermelon

a glass of sweet tea

It is the time of year for watermelon and sweet tea. As a child, I drink sweet tea because either my grandmother made or my mother who made sweet tea. As I grew older, I stopped drinking sweet tea; however, when I turned 65 I went back to drinking sweet tea because I realized that I liked it better then unsweetened tea.

I prefer to purchase jugs of sweet tea in the store because when I make it at home I always put too much sugar in the tea. When I go to restaurants, I order raspberry tea because it has the right amount of sweetness and it quenches my thirst.

summer solstice heat

a tall raspberry ice tea

a warm afternoon

Thankful Thursday June 20, 2013

Istiqlál (Independence), 16 Núr (Light), 170 BE – Thursday, June 20, 2013 about 2:15 PM Pacific Daylight Time

Today I am Thankful

1. for the my bereavement group meetings on the first and third Wednesday of each month
2. for the ice cube in my freezer so that I can have ice water or ice coffee this afternoon
3. for the can of mixed fruit I at for lunch
4. for a beautiful blue sky on the last day of spring
5. for the wind blowing through the small elm tree growing at the corner of my garage
6. for the neighbor’s dog that barks during the night
7. for a working air conditioner
8. for the positive mood I am in today
9. for the electricity that powers my computer and my air conditioner
10. for grilled cheese sandwiches

Wordless Wednesday: Please visit my writing.com port

I want to cry

Fidál (Grace), 14 Núr (Light), 170 BE – Tuesday, June 18, 2013 about 10:38 AM Pacific Daylight Time

I want to cry,
I don’t know why,
but I want to cry.

I’m not sure what the problem is, but suddenly I wanted to cry. It could be the results of my breakfast of eggs, cheese, and fish sticks. It could be something else causing this feeling. I feel as if I am descending into a well of depression. I feel like I am falling into a deep, dark pit. Therefore, I sit down to write about the way I feel.

Normally I would write about this feeling in my offline journal, Writing My Spiritual Journey; however, not this morning. I’m going to make this blog entry about the depression. Writing helps me figure out the reason for my dark mood. Writing, also, helps me overcome it; writing down my feels helps me sort out the reason for the way I feel.

The darkness has started to pass. I no longer want to cry, so I suspect it had something to do with my breakfast. I don’t know how that could be because I have ate those items for breakfast before and not wanted to cry. I should talk to my doctor about this the next time I see her, but I am not sure when my next appointment is supposed to occur. I think I had better call her office and find out.

I don’t think I’m supposed to see her before November or December. I could be wrong about that and since I don’t think the office has my new phone number they can’t get hold of me. I’ll give them a call with the new number.

Friday Afternoon

Istiqlál (Independence), 10 Núr (Light), 170 BE - Friday, June 14, 2013 about 4:58 PM Pacific Daylight Time

Friday afternoon
The end of a long workweek
A breeze is blowing

Friday afternoon
Triple digit temperatures
Birds are in their nests

Midweek Reflections on Triple Digit Temperatures

‘Idál (Justice), 8 Núr (Light), 170 BE – Wednesday, June 12, 2013 about 10:05 AM Pacific Time

Summer officially begins on June 21, but the summer temperatures begin in Las Vegas on June 1. We had extreme heat warning for the first five or six days of June because of the sudden raise in temperatures. The extreme heat warnings have stopped; however, we are still experiencing triple digit temperatures. We will not receive any more extreme heat warnings as long as the temperature stays below 110 degrees.

The first few day of June going out of the house, even in the morning, was difficult. I do not find it difficult any more, which is probably a good thing because I have to go to the bank and the grocery store on Thursday morning. Then next Monday I have an appointment with my eye doctor at 10:00 AM. I hope that it is cloudy next week because the clouds help lower the temperature a bit.

It is cloudy this morning, which indicates some humidity. The humidity does not seem to be a problem today or maybe I can deal with the humidity better then I could a couple of years ago. I do not think there is a chance for rain; at least the clouds do not look like rain clouds. I guess I should check the weather report online to see what to expect the rest of the day and tomorrow.

Standing in the Sunshine: A Poem

Fiḍál (Grace), 7 Núr (light), 170 BE - Tuesday, June 11, 2013 about 11:48 AM Pacific Time

White clouds and blue sky
A bird flies over the roof of my garage
The sun cast weak shadows on a partly cloudy day

This morning,
When I went out to pick up the newspaper
I stood in the sunshine
I stood for five minutes
Feeling the warm rays
Penetrate my bare arms
And bringing me
Light's warm vitamins

Blue Monday June 10, 2013

Kamál (Perfection), 6 Núr (Light), 170 BE – Monday, June 10, 2013 about 7:24 AM Pacific Daylight Time

 Blue Monday is depressing. This morning I am having an issue with my stomach, which is causing my Blue Monday feelings. I think I am experiencing hyper-acidity this morning; however, I do not know why. I took my pill last night and I have not eaten anything that normally causes my hyper-acidity.

Eating breakfast will help, but I do not want to eat anything that may increase the problem. Considering the way my stomach feels, I think a can of applesauce might be a good breakfast. Applesauce is easy to digest and it is easy on my stomach. If I feel better this afternoon then I will fix something a bit more substantial.

Since I do not feel like driving this morning, I will go out on Tuesday. I have one bill I have to pay and I need to pick up a loaf of bread. I guess I should make a grocery list before I go, but before I make the grocery list, I have to check the online coupons on the grocery store website. I cannot purchase too much because of the bill I have to pay.

it is blue Monday
darkness and pain overtake
the sunshiny day

Summer in Las Vegas: A Poem

Jamál (Beauty), 5 Núr (Light), 170 BE - Sunday, June 6, 2013 about 1:56 PM Pacific Daylight Time

unofficially summer
with triple digit temperatures
we wait for the solstice
to make the season official

excessive heat warnings
arrive on June 1
with temperatures exceeding
the century mark
summer become official
on the 21st of the month.

Friday morning inspiration

Istiqlál (Independence), 3 Núr (Light), 170 BE – Friday, June 7, 2013 about 6:55 AM Pacific Daylight Time

I looked out my window about dawn and watched the oak tree across the street. Dawn’s light appeared to transform the leaves from green to orange. It was a beautiful and inspiring sight on this Friday morning. Sights like that make me want to write haiku.

dawn’s beautiful light
turns green oak leaves to orange
summer is coming

This always happens, in the few weeks before summer. I will miss this sight when I move. I know I will find new inspiration for poems wherever I live. I know that, no matter where I find myself, I will find inspiration for haiku, but I will still miss the way dawn’s light turns the oak trees green leaves orange.

bright morning sunlight
casting dark tree shaped shadow
on neighborhood lawns

It is a beautiful morning in Las Vegas, the sky is cloudless and the sun is bright. This is a good day to find inspiration for all types of poetry. I like writing haiku because they are quick (sometimes) and short. I can write them and post them without worrying about syntax or grammar the way I do with prose.

Triple Digit Day in Las Vegas

Istijlál (Majesty), 2 Núr (Light), 170 BE - Thursday, June 6, 2013 about 7:33 PM Pacific Daylight Time

triple digit day
temperatures rising above
the century mark

triple digit day
an excessive heat warning
no record is set

Midweek Reflections on Knowledge of Self

‘Idál (Justice), 1 Núr (Light), 170 BE - Wednesday, June 5, 2013 about 5:42 PM Pacific Daylight Time

I have encountered several tests this week and each one of these tests has given me information about myself. Each test has revealed area that need improvement. One area I need to improve is my grammar skills. The grammar skills that need improvement concerns run on sentences, inconsistent pronoun use, problems with punctuation, and tense usage.

Since these are areas I need to improve, I am going to change the way I make my blog entries. I think I will go back to the using my word processor to compose the entries and then upload them to my blog or attempt to post them by using my e-mail. I have never attempted that method before, so I am not sure what success I will have. The only thing I can do is try it and see if I can make the posts using that method. If I have problems with that method then I can always go back to copy and past.

I am Looking for a Positive Attitude

Fiḍál (Grace), 19 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Tuesday, June 4, 2013 about 8:11 AM Pacific Daylight Time

It's Tuesday, June 4, and I'm looking for a positive attitude. I'm not feeling very well so perhaps that's why my attitude is negative. I wrote a response to an image prompt for a blogging challenge I'm participating in on writing.com. I wrote a poem in response to the prompt, so my response was neither too negative or too positive.

It was only after I wrote the response that my attitude began to turn negative. I've noticed that I can wake up in a positive mood, but after I've been up a while my positive attitude turns negative. Sometimes I'm not sure what causes the change and at other times I realize why my attitude changes. This morning I suspect it changed because of technical issues with one of my computers. When it comes to technology, I suspect I have issues with patience.

Sometimes my positive mood changes when I have difficulties with technology. I know that letting a piece of equipment affect my mood is silly. I have to figure out why technology issues bother me more then they should.  I guess the only way to do that is to attempt a free write exercise in my off line journal.

Flabbergasted - A Word My Grandmother used

Jamál (Beauty), 17 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Sunday, June 2, 2013 about 9:57 AM Pacific Daylight Time

My grandmother used the word flabbergasted when something surprised, astounded, or amazed her. Until this morning, I had not thought of that word in years. It is not a word I normally use because in my mind it is out-of-date, but it is in the dictionary.

I was composing an entry for my writing.com blog about a poem which won an award in a contest and I thought of the word. As I considered the word, I realized it expressed my feelings when I read the e-mail about the prize. I learned about the award on Saturday as I was reading my e-mail; when I read about the award I simply stared at the screen and then reread the e-mail. My next action was to transfer the poem into the proper folder.

After thinking about the word, I think I will use it in a poem or short story. I have one short story in which flabbergasted would work. The reason it would work is that it expressed the feelings of the main character at a specific time in the story.

Afternoon naps and pencil shavings

Jalál (Glory), 16 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Saturday, June 1 ,2013 about 4:40 PM Pacific Daylight Time

My afternoon nap dream...
pencil shaving in a cereal bowl
and a brown paper bag;
strangers
knocking at my door
with junk mail
they didn't want;
family members
coming and going
going and coming.

My afternoon nap dreams
become weirder and weirder
maybe I should
stop taking afternoon naps.

I need a break

‘Idál (Justice), 13 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Wednesday, May 29, 2013 about 11:50 AM Pacific Daylight Time

I need to take a short break and fix myself something to eat. I spent the morning reviewing on writing.com, I am attempting to earn enough Gift Points to purchase another one-month premium membership. I suppose it would be easier if I purchased a years upgraded membership, but then I would have to remove several stories from my portfolio.

I am not as tired as yesterday at this time, but if I do not get me something to eat it will affect my performance later today and tomorrow. There was a time when I could work without worrying about whether or not I ate lunch. I could skip breakfast and lunch without it effecting my performance, but not anymore. Now I have to have at least two meals a day or I am wore out the next day.

I think I will fix me a a couple of grilled cheese sandwiches today.   I have not ate a grilled cheese this week and the cheese will give me energy. A grilled cheese sandwich is also filling, I know there are a lot of calories in this type of sandwich. I do not worry about calories any more and eat whatever I want in moderation. I believe moderation is the key to a good diet, as long as I do not eat too much of a food then I can eat whatever I want.

Monday Epiphany

Kamál (Perfection), 11 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Monday, May 27, 2013 about 11:36 AM Pacific Daylight Time

The chocolate cake I baked yesterday is too big for just one person. I will be eating cake for a week and by the time Friday comes the cake will be dry. I will have to our coffee or milk on the cake so that I can eat it. I like having coffee with my cake, but I prefer to have a cup of coffee rather then the coffee poured over my cake.

All right, this is my own fault. When I bought the cake mix I did not think about the cooking for one issue.  It is difficult to cook for one person when you have spent most of your life cooking for two. However, I am going to have to learn to cook for one, especially when it comes to deserts like cake.

After thinking about this situation over breakfast, which was a slice of cake and a cup of coffee, I have decided to it is best for me to eat cake in a restaurant. In a restaurant I can order one slice of cake with ice cream and not have to worry about any leftovers. As much as I enjoy cooking a cake in a microwave, I will have to stop fixing cake at home.

I do not mind leftovers of pasta or other items, but cake is different. If I have leftover cake in the house I will eat too much and this means I cannot have cake or any type of desert (fruit excluded) for a month. Oh well, life always has something to teach and sometimes the lesson is one I teach myself.

Sunday epiphany

Jamál (Beauty), 10 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Sunday, May 26, 2013 about 2:23 PM Pacific Daylight Time

I baked a chocolate cake in the microwave today. I mixed the cake according to the directions on the box and then put it into a microwavable casserole dish because I don't have anything else to use for cakes when I put them in the microwave. It took the cake nine minutes to bake and I'm waiting for it to cool enough to ice.

When I smelled the cake baking, I realized that I don't want to bake cakes any other way. The cake smelled the same as it would in a conventional oven, but I could smell the cake sooner in the microwave. I like baking cakes in microwaves, especially in summer when I don't want to use a regular oven. I also like baking in a microwave in winter because I don't have to wait as long for the item to bake.

microwavable
casserole dishes waiting
for me to make lunch

nine minutes to bake
a dark chocolate fudge cake
what more can I ask

I found the answer to Friday's problem

Jalál (Glory), 9 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Saturday, May 25, 2013 about 9:17 AM Pacific Daylight Time

This morning I figured out what caused my stomach pain yesterday. The problem was caused by drinking coffee without eating anything all morning. I have a bad habit of not eating breakfast before 10:00 or 11:00 AM, which means that often I go out without any food in my stomach. I drink coffee, but I do not eat. On Friday, that is what caused the pain in my stomach.

I figured that out this morning because I drink a cup of coffee without eating anything. The pain in my stomach started again. After the pain started, I fixed myself a couple of eggs with buttered toast. Once I ate the pain went away. When I was younger things like this did not bother me, but now that I am over 60 it gives me problems.

This afternoon I will mix some powdered milk so that I can have cereal with my morning coffee. That should take care of part of the problem with my stomach. The only thing I have to figure out now concerns the specific food or foods that I eat which causes me issues. I suspect the culprit is foods that hove cooked tomatoes in them. Unfortunately, there is not very much I can do about that because I receive canned tomatoes and pasta sauce with my senior food allotment.

I can limit myself to one can of pasta sauce or diced tomatoes a week, but I cannot eliminate them all together. I can also add other ingredients to the pasta dishes to help dilute the pasta sauce. The last thing I can do is make sure I take the prescription for my stomach problems everyday. Taking all those steps will allow me to eat the foods I like without dealing with the pain that those foods cause. If the pain gets worse or occurs more then once every two or three months then I will have to talk to my doctor about other solutions or other problems.

Friday afternoon in Las Vegas

Istiqlál (Independence), 8 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Friday, May 24, 2013 about 7:29 PM Pacific Time

I can't say this was a normal Friday afternoon because I spent most of it asleep on the couch. This morning I picked up a loaf of free day old bread and my senior food allotment and then came home. When I arrived back at the house, I put the milk and the cheese in the refrigerator, warmed up a cup of leftover coffee in the microwave, and then sit down at the computer to do some blog entries and other writing.

I opened two little packages of cookies to go with my coffee. I managed to complete the a blog entry in my writing.com blog before my stomach began hurting. My stomach does this every so often and the only thing I can do for it is say the Long Healing Prayer and lay down for a nap. I don't know why my stomach began hurting today because I have taken the medication everyday for  the past week. The problem is either something I eat or didn't eat.

I feel better now, but I doubt I can sleep tonight. Therefore, I will either do some housework or write. I could wash and dry a load of clothes while I'm writing. I could also pack up some of Mom's clothes to give away. The place I pick up free bread also gives away food and clothes, so I could take Mom's clothes to that place.

I have to pick up another loaf of bread next week sometimes, so I'll take a couple of bags of clothes when I go to pick up the bread. I have several other things to do next week as well and at least two of them are in the same direction as the place I pick up the free bread.

Change is in the Air

Istijlál (Majesty), 7 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Thursday, May 23, 2013 about 10:41 AM Pacific Daylight Time

I don't know why I feel that change is in the air. Maybe I'm just tired of living in this house and I want to move as soon as I can find a place I can afford. Maybe it has to do with the dream I had about Mom yesterday or was it the day before. I'm not going to write the entire dream because I put it in my dream journal, Dreams of Snow, which I store in my writing.com port.

The more I think about the dream, the more I realize that it was telling me to let go of the past. I suspect there was more to the dream then simply telling me to let go. There were a couple of symbols in the dream that I didn't understand, but eventually I will figure out those symbols. I prefer to interpret my own dreams.

Sometimes I will look up the meaning of a dream symbol on the internet, but normally I like to do a timed free write about the symbol. Perhaps that's what I should do with the symbols I can't figure out in my last dream. The symbol that is bothering me the most was the antique gas stove. I can't figure out where the symbol came from and what it means.

Eventually figure out meaning of the stove. In the mean time, I will do my best to let go of the worry and the fear of the change that is occurring in my life. I'm looking forward to finding a new place and finishing some writing projects I have going. Maybe that's what the stove referred to the projects I've put on the back burner.

Late Afternoon in Las Vegas

Fiḍál (Grace), 5 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Tuesday, May 21, 2013 about 7:15 PM Pacific Daylight Time

It's late afternoon in Las Vegas, the sky is partly cloudy and the wind is blowing. The high today was 94 degrees and the low tonight is supposed to be 70 degrees. I have had my afternoon nap, so I'm rested and ready for my evening at home.

partly cloudy sky
the wind caresses tree limbs
a nice desert day

As I look out the window, I see that my neighbors across the street have taken out their trash. Tomorrow is trash collection day in my neighborhood, so the trashcans have to be at the curb by 6:30 AM. Sometimes the garbage trucks pick up the trash close to 7:00 AM and sometimes they don't get to this street until afternoon. I will wait until morning to roll the trash to the curb.

The wind is still blowing in Las Vegas

Kamál (Perfection), 4 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Monday, May 20, 2013 about 1:58 PM Pacific Time

The wind is still blowing in Las Vegas. It seems as if we have had more windy day  this month then normal; however, that may just me my opinion. I look out the living room window and watch the limbs of the olive tree across the street wave. The tree seems to be waving good-by to spring because we have begun encountering triple digit days.

triple digit days
cast warm shadows over May
the wind is blowing

I don't like getting out of the house on triple digit days, but often I have no other choice. I just checked the temperature for Las Vegas on weather.com. According to weather.com the temperature right now is 81 degrees, but it feels like 79 degrees; I guess that is because the wind is blowing. The high today is supposed to be 84 degrees. I like those temperatures better then the triple digit temperatures we've experienced for the past few days.

I like getting out of the house better in 80 degree temperatures rather then 100 degree temperatures. I think that's because the air in my car doesn't work properly. I usually plan my trips to the store and every place else in the morning or the evening. Sometime I have to get out during the hottest part of the day, but I don't like doing that.

Sunday Blessings

Jamál (Beauty), 3 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Sunday, May 19, 2013 about 10:20 AM Pacific Time

It is a beautiful Sunday morning in Las Vegas. These are some of the blessings God granted me this morning

1. A cloudless blue sky
2. Wind blowing through the olive and oak trees
3. Bright sunshine casting dark shadows across the front yard
4. A fresh carafe of rich dark coffee
5. Birds singing when I went out to pick up the newspaper
6. Cold cuts and eggs in the refrigerator
7. Ice cubes in the freezer
8. A joyful mood
9. A talk with one of my brothers
10. The sound of jets flying overhead

Fifteen Minutes of Laughter

Istiqlál (Independence), 1 ‘Aẓamat (Grandeur), 170 BE - Friday, May 17, 2013 about 3:07 PM Pacific Time

I am in a blog competition at writing.com and the prompt for Friday always has something to do with humor. This morning the question was "Have you laughed today?" Since I planned to go to the grocery store, I thought I would get that entry written and posted early, but I had not laughed. As I was looking for something to make me laugh, I came across a YouTube video about a study concerning laughter and the heart.

According to the doctor on the video fifteen minutes of laughter a day is good for a person's heart. Apparently, laughter has something to do with opening up the blood vessels or something like that. I thought that was interesting, I also discovered something else while I was researching the entry. I found out that, at least with me, laughter is contagious.

I realized that laughter was contagious while I was watching a video (on YouTube) of someone laughing. I could not stop laughing while the person on the video was laughing. Since I find laughing contagious, I should not have any difficulty laughing for fifteen minutes a day as long a I watch a video of someone laughing; it is worth a try anyway.

Nature is Wonderful

Istijlál (Majesty), 19 Jamál (Beauty), 170 BE - Thursday, May 16, 2013 about 11:05 AM Pacific Time

Nature is wonderful. Nature is beautiful. The birds are singing and have been for several days. For the past week, a white butterfly has flitted past my living room window and through my yard. I think the butterfly is attracted to the weeds in my front yard. In addition, to these beautiful creatures, I saw a white dove fly past my window yesterday. It is a joy to wake up, look outside, or stand on my front porch and listen.

a white butterfly
is flitting from weed to weed
a nightingale sings

A Lonely Afternoon in Las Vegas

Fiḍál (Grace), 17 Jamál (Beauty), 170 BE - Tuesday, May 14, 2013 about 1:16 PM Pacific Time

Another lonely afternoon,
watching the wind blow through a neighbor's olive tree,
watching thin scattered clouds move across the blue sky,
and watching cars drive past.

Another lonely afternoon,
listening to the area fan blow
and feeling its cool air on my arms.

Another lonely afternoon,
missing my mother
and writing poetry.

Mother's Day 2013

Jamál (Beauty), 15 Jamál (Beauty), 170 BE - Sunday, May 12, 2013 about 1:05 PM Pacific Time

It is Mother's Day. It is my first Mother's Day without my mother. I visited her grave this morning and said a prayer for the departed. I miss Mama so much that I want to cry, but instead I write.

I looked down at Mama's headstone, it is a reddish stone with a rose engraved on one side. Mom's favorite color was red. Mom's favorite flowers were roses.

I looked down at Mama's headstone, I placed my purse on the ground and removed my prayer book. As I stood looking down, I read a prayer for the departed.

I looked down at Mama's headstone and I listened to the birds singing in the trees. Mama love to listen to the birds.

I looked down at Mama's headstone and I inhaled the fragrance of spring in the air. Mama like spring, she like listening to the birds sing in spring.

I looked down at Mama's headstone and I know she would like the spot where her bones rest.

Moving into the twenty-first century

Istiqlál (Independence), 13 Jamál (Beauty), 170 BE - Friday, May 10, 2013 about 2:25 PM Pacific Time

I finally did it, I finally deposited a check at the ATM outside my bank. I received a check through the mail yesterday, so this morning I went to the bank and ask one of the associates to assist me in the process. Depositing the check at the ATM is easy and I can receive a receipt with a picture of the check. The next time I will deposit the check myself without asking for assistance. I am moving into the twenty-first century.

After stopping at the bank, I went to the grocery story. I went through the self-checkout with assistance form on of the employees, but I think the next time I go to the grocery store I will do it by myself. If I do need help then there is an employee close by to ask assistance. Modern technology is wonder and I am moving into the twenty-first century.

Thankful Thursday: May 9, 2013

Istijlál (Majesty), 12 Jamál (Beauty), 170 BE - Thursday, May 9, 2013 about 9:33 AM Pacific Time

Today I am Thankful

1. for the zoom feature on my computer because I can increase the screen image from 100% to 125% to make the information easier to read
2. for he new look of writing.com  
3. for the rice dark coffee I brewed this morning
4. for the beautiful cloudy day we are experiencing in Las Vegas
5. that I have an electric clothes dryer because my towels are softer then when I dry them on the line or spread them over furniture
6. for the little bit of sleep I got last night, it took me two or three hours to go to sleep
7. that the people who pick up the trash finally picked up the limbs that were at the curb
8. for the sun that randomly shines through the cloud cover
9. for the chicken I have left in the refrigerator
10. that I got the trashcan rolled to the curb yesterday before trash collection time

Midweek Reflections: I need to get out of the house

‘Idál (Justice), 11 Jamál (Beauty), 170 BE - Wednesday, May 8, 2013 about 2:30 PM Pacific Time

I think I need to get out of the house for more the a few minutes at a time. I need to go somewhere besides to the garage. Last week I went out of the house twice, both times before I completely recovered from being ill. I am feeling better today, so tomorrow I will get out of the house and go to the store or the gas station.

Is it cabin fever?
I look at the clouds covering the sky,
I want to do something
besides house work.

I need to get out of the house more. I need to do something out of the ordinary, at least once a month. Perhaps I need to go out to eat, I have not been to a restaurant in two or three months. The only problems is deciding which restaurant I want to go for lunch or dinner. Maybe I will go out on Mother's Day, after I visit Mom's grave.

Thinking about Mother's Day

Fiḍál (Grace), 10 Jamál (Beauty), 170 BE - Tuesday, May 7, 2013 about 3:43 PM Pacific Time

All day I have watched the wind blow through the boughs of the trees in my neighborhood. All day I have watch the clouds gather in the sky. This afternoon it is mostly cloudy, with patches of blue sky showing through. Sunday is Mother's Day, the first Mother's Day I will spend without Mom. The first Mother's Day I will not have a gift for her.

All day I have watched the clouds and the wind. All day I have though about Mom and Mother's Day. I will go to the cemetery to visit her grave. I will take my prayer book and read a prayer for the departed. I will not put flowers on her grave because I do not have enough money to purchase her a bouquet  of her favorite flowers. I will say a prayer for the departed, but I cannot put a bouquet of red roses on her grave. How I would love to purchase a bouquet of roses for Mama for Mother's Day, but I do not have enough money in my bank account.

A Beautiful Partly Cloudy Day in Las Vegas

Kamál (Perfection), 9 Jamál (Beauty), 170 BE - Monday, May 6, 2013 about 2:00 PM Pacific Daylight Time

I suppose I could gripe, but not about the weather. It is a beautiful partly or mostly cloudy day in Las Vegas. I hear the echoes of thunder earlier; however, that does not mean it is going to rain. I might rain somewhere in Las Vegas, but not in my neighborhood. This is all right with me because I do not like to carry newspapers or anything else to the garage in the rain.

I was sick for five days out of seven last week, so I did not get the recyclables or the trash to the curb on Saturday. I did not get much of anything accomplished on Saturday except sleep. I did learn one thing about myself. I do not like being by myself when I am sick any more then I like dealing with other human beings when I am ill.  I know that sound strange but it is true.

When I am sick, I want a pet. Unfortunately, when I move I will probably move into a complex that does not allow pets because I cannot afford anything else. This entry sounds like it could become a rant and it is much to nice outside to gripe about anything.

A Beautiful Friday in Las Vegas

Istiqlál (Independence), 6 Jamál (Beauty), 170 BE - Friday, May 3, 2013 about 5:14 PM Pacific Daylight Time

It's Friday and the technician came to check the heat pump today. He turned on the cool air and set the thermostat to 83 degrees. I cannot stand to live in a house where the temperature gets higher the 83 degree or lower the 80 degrees. If the temperature is lower then 80, I will be cold all the time and I do not like feeling cold. I do not like shivering.

It's a beautiful day in Las Vegas. The sun is shining, the birds are singing or they were singing this morning. This afternoon the birds are silent. I do not hear them chirping or singing. I do not see them flying from tree to tree. Still it's a beautiful Friday in Las Vegas.

The reason I do not like being sick

‘Idál (Justice), 4 Jamál (Beauty), 170 BE - Wednesday, May 1, 2013 about 11:42 AM Pacific Daylight Time

April was National Poetry Month and I managed to write 28 poems. That was almost a poem a day, unfortunately because I was ill for about three days I missed two poems. I should not complain because despite being sick for three day, I managed to review enough items on writing.com so that I earned enough Gift Points to renew my premium membership for another month. My membership now expires on May 31, 2013.

The problems was my concentration, I could only concentrate for about an hour at a time before I started to fall asleep at the keyboard. It is not a good idea for me to fall asleep at my computer keyboard because I fall out of my chair when I drop off to sleep while working online. When I catch myself starting to doze off, I have to get up and go lay down on the couch for a short nap. When I am sick, my naps last for three or four hours at a time, which makes it difficult to get anything accomplished online.

I do not like being sick because it puts me behind on almost everything. I do not like being ill because it interferes with writing poetry or anything else. I missed two whole days of blog entries. I missed completing a poem a day during National Poetry Month. I missed my coffee because the only thing I wanted to drink was water. I missed meals because I could no eat more then three bites at a time. I missed doing laundry because I did not want to put clothes in the washer that would sit for a couple of day before I could dry them.

Sick for two or three days

Fiḍál (Grace), 3 Jamál (Beauty), 170 BE - Tuesday, April 30, 2013 about 10:50 AM Pacific Time

I was sick for two or was it three days, it really does not matter because I am now in recovery. The whole thing started with chills on the April 27. I checked the thermostat and it show 80 degrees. I realized then that the problem was not the house being cold, but that I was sick or coming down with something. The chills lasted until late Sunday or early Monday.

The only thing I wanted to drink for a couple of days was water. When I do not have a desire for coffee that means I am ill. I did not go to the Emergency Room or the Urgent Care because I did not feel I could drive myself safely and I did not think I was sick enough to go to the hospital. I attempted to eat something those days; however, I did not each much and, as a results, I am tired and weak today. I will fix me something to eat today and bake a batch of cornbread.

The only type of bread I have in the house is cornbread mix. I have to build up my strength and energy today because I have two meeting tomorrow. One of the meetings, a Grief Counseling Group, is at 4:00 PM on the East side of Las Vegas. The other meeting, is at 7:00 PM on the West side of Las Vegas. I hope to attend both meetings.

I am feeling better this morning

Jalál (Glory), 19 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Saturday, April 27, 2013 about 7:04 AM Pacific Time

Last night the temperature in the house rose to 82 degrees, but to me it felt like it was 69 or 70 degrees. I  had chills and possibly a fever; however, since I cannot find the thermometer I am not sure about the temperature. I was so cold that I took the wool blanket, which I intended to take to the storage unit and put it over me last night.

I was light headed, an indication that I could not drive myself to the Emergency Room. I did not call an ambulance because I  had no desire to chance clothes because I had no desire to get ready and wait for the Emergency Personnel, so I stayed home and covered up with my wool blanket. I feel better this morning, but I am still not up to driving any place today. I may change my mind later this afternoon, but for now I will remain in the house and attempt to get some work accomplished or at least take a nap.

Coffee Under Ordinary Conditions

Istiqlál (Independence), 18 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - About 2:32 PM Pacific Daylight Time

A few months ago, one of my doctors ask "How much coffee do you drink a day?" I gave him my standard answer to this question "Under ordinary condition three cups." This is true, I make a full 12-cup carafe of coffee, but normally I only drink three cup that day. The next day I warm up the leftover coffee in the Microwave and drink three more cups. This way I only have to make fresh coffee once or twice a week.

The doctor did not ask me to define ordinary conditions, which is just as well. The reason, is that sometimes I drink four or five cups and, under rare conditions, the entire 12-cup carafe. Today is one of those rare conditions because I have already drank six cups and I will no doubt drink the other three cups before the day is over.

The reason for this over consumption of coffee is simple. I ran out of coffee last week and did not have to money to purchase more. This situation occurs every time I run out of coffee and am unable to purchase it for a week. I have decided the best way to prevent this situation is to purchase coffee on the third or fourth of every month whether I need it or not. That way I have a couple of containers stocked up in case I run short of cash.

Still working on downsizing

Istijlál (Majesty), 17 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Thursday, April 25, 2013 about 10:50 AM Pacific Daylight Time

I have six containers of quilt blocks and material pieces out of the house. I have one large empty trunk, which I am going to fill with books from my personal library. I have another large trunk in the dining room that I have to empty, but I do not know what it contains. I am sure it does not contain books because I removed the books in 2007 to store something else inside, but I do not remember what I stored.

I am not sure I will open that trunk today. I have to pull it away from the wall and my back is soar from pulling the trunk with the material into the entrance hall last night. However, my back is not the only  part of me that hurts from the exercise. My osteoarthritis is acting up today, so I think I will fix me something to eat and take one of my pain pills. That will help alleviate the pain, which will make packing the empty trunk I have a little easier.

Downsizing is a slow process, which is not helped by the pain in my back and my knees. It is nice to have the material out of the house. I still have a lot of things to remove, but I think posting on freecycle will make the process of downsizing easier.

The Procress of De-cluttering

‘Idál (Justice), 16 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Wednesday, April 24, 2013 about 1:22 PM Pacific Time

It is difficult to let go. It is difficult to de-clutter. The process of de-cluttering is part of the process of letting go. It is acceptance that life has changed, it is part of the mourning process. My mother had two large containers of material and quilt blocks or material scraps she intended to use to make quilts. She never did get around to making quilts with them. Since I have no intention of making any quilts, I decided to give them away.

I posted the items on Freecycle, I received responses, and I contacted one of the respondents. The person will pick the material up tomorrow morning. I feel so much better now that I have the process of de-cluttering started. I still have several other items to give away, which I will do over the next couple of week. Mom's clothes I will give to local charities, while other things I will post on Freecycle because I am sure someone will want them.

I feel much better now that I have decided to give away some of Mom's craft items. There are other to give away or for me to take with me and finish. I have not decided if I want to keep the items Mom was going to paint (fabric paint) or not. I have to do some research to see if I can afford to purchase the paints or not. I suspect some of Mom's paints are so old that I cannot use them; I'll have to try them out and see.

Earth Day: The Faces of Climate Change

Kamál (Perfection), 14 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Monday, April 22, 2013 about 2:47 PM Pacific Daylight Time

Everywhere I look,
I see the faces of climate change.

I see the faces of climate change,
in scorched fields
waiting for rain that will never come.

I see the faces of climate change,
in the eyes of mothers
wondering where they will find food
for their starving children.

I see the faces of climate change,
in dust clouds
of fertile topsoil
blowing across once prosperous
farm land.

I see the faces of climate change,
in the faces of animals
searching for green
in the middle of brown and dying
meadow.

Everywhere I look,
I see the faces of climate change.

The First Day of Ridvan

Jamál (Beauty), 13 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Sunday, April 21, 2013 about 9:05 AM Pacific Daylight Time

It is April 21, the First Day of Ridvan. It is a Holy Day celebrating the Declaration of Bahá’u’lláh. The celebration begin on the evening of Saturday, April 20, at the Baha'i Center. I attended the celebration last night and was so excited that I could not sleep after I returned home. I finally got to sleep sometime this morning and then the alarm woke me up at 4:00 AM so that I could take my thyroid medication.

I turned the alarm off, took my medication, and went back to sleep, but I got up again about 6:00 AM. That time I got up permanently because there was no use going back to sleep. After I got up, I checked the chicken in the refrigerator to see it it was thawed so that I could cook a couple of pieces. I have the leg and thy sections cooking now.

There is something going on at the Baha'i Center this afternoon. I think I will attend, I missed going to Holy Day celebrations and the nineteen-day feast while I was taking care of Mom. I can begin going back to those things now. I know I have a lot of stuff to do here at the house; however, take a break for spiritual matters will energize me to get more accomplished at home.

Positive or Negative Friday

Istiqlál (Independence), 11 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Friday, April 19, 2013 about 7:52 AM Pacific Daylight Time

It's Friday morning and I'm attempting to keep the positive attitude I had when I woke up. The blues hit me suddenly like someone lowering a shade in a room. I don't think there is any reason for me to be depressed today. Thursday was a good day, it was a productive day.

On Thursday I completed a 500 plus essay and a 1000 plus short story. I submitted both items before the 8:59 PM Pacific Time Deadline. I picked up my April senior food allotment and received a wonderful surprise. I was given a frozen cut up whole chicken, the chicken remained frozen on the drive home, and I was able to put it in my freezer. I also picked up a free loaf of day old bread, so I can have grilled cheese sandwiches or peanut butter and jelly sandwiches this weekend.

I suppose there are some negatives, I ran out of coffee yesterday, but I still have a lot of tea bags in the house. I enjoy tea, perhaps not as much as coffee, but it will do in a pinch. I could be a bit depressed at the thought of not having coffee; however, I haven't been without it even twenty-four hours. I don't think lack of caffeine is the reason for my slight depression.

I'm not going to worry about the reason now because the depression has passed. My depression always passes when I sit down to write about it. I think it is the positive activity of writing and helps lighten my mind.

Thankful Thursday: April 18, 2013

Istijlál (Majesty), 10 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Thursday, April 18, 2013 about 6:57 PM Pacific Daylight Time

Today I am thankful for

1. The loaf of free day old bread I received today
2. The jar of peanut butter I received with my senior food allotment today
3. The frozen whole cut up chicken I received with my senior food allotment today
4. The jug of cold grape juice I have in the refrigerator
5. Grilled cheese sandwiches
6. The 2% carton of milk I received today
7. The jar of grape jelly I have in the refrigerator
8. The cool weather we have had in Las Vegas lately
9. My new senior citizens cell phone
10. The prayers revealed by Baha'u'llah

Midweek Reflections on Surveys

‘Idál (Justice), 9 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Wednesday, April 17, 2013 about 1:30 PM Pacific Daylight Time

I do surveys in my spare time. I used to do a lot more then I do today, so on Monday I decided to increase the amount I was doing. This morning I was doing surveys and realized that while I enjoy doing a few I do have fun when I do a great deal of them. Therefore, I am unsubscribing to some of the survey groups. I am not sure how many I will exit.

I have already decided on one group to exit, which I will do after I finish this post. I know my response to surveys help businesses and I enjoy responding to the surveys. The problems belonging to so many groups. I joined most of the groups five or ten years ago and I have changed. I want to do something else besides surveys therefore I will limit the amount of surveys I do and my group memberships.

I find that I enjoy writing more then I enjoy answer surveys. I am going to focus more on writing then doing surveys. I find writing a poem fun and challenging. I think that is what I like best about writing the challenge and the feeling after I complete a poem or a short story.

The heat and the cool air are off

Fiḍál (Grace), 8 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Tuesday, April 16, 2013 about 3:50 PM Pacific Daylight Time

I turn the air unit off sometime the last of March or the first of April, I am not precisely sure when I turned it off. The highest temperature has gotten outside is about 88 degrees and the temperature in the house on that day rose to 80 degrees. I think that was last Wednesday or Thursday, this week I think the temperatures were lower.

I hope I can keep the unit off until at least the end of April. I would like to keep it off all through May, but I am not sure that is possible. I will have to listen to the weather forecast closer in May because that is when we begin getting triple digit days here in Las Vegas. I am not looking forward to using air conditioning this summer because of the power bills. I simply cannot afford them any more, so I have to get out of this house as soon as possible.

The problem with moving is finding a place I can afford. There are a lot of senior apartments that I like, but cannot afford. Apparently, everyone thinks if you are a senior citizen you have plenty of money. This is not true, at least in my case. I am going to have to move before it gets too hot here in Las Vegas.

A Hazy Day in Las Vegas

Kamál (Perfection), 7 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Monday, April 15, 2013 about 6:20 PM Pacific Daylight Time

The sky is hazy because the wind has blown all day. It is so hazy that I cannot see the blue sky. The wind is still blowing perhaps not as hard as earlier today, but enough to prevent anyone with dust allergies from going outside.

When I listen to the weather earlier they said to expect wind tomorrow. The meteorologist also suggest it may rain, which is all right with me as long as it waits until after I get home or rains before I leave the house. I did not intend to go out tomorrow, but I have to fax one or two papers back east.

A sleepy Sunday Afternoon

Jamál (Beauty), 6 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Sunday, April 14, 2013 about 5:45 PM Pacific Daylight Time

I keep yawning. I'm so sleepy that I want to lay my head on the computer keyboard and go to sleep. I don't know what's wrong because I took a nap about 12:30 PM.  I've finished the coffee leftover from yesterday, so the only thing left to drink is the grape juice in the refrigerator, hot tea, or water.  I think the only tea I have in the house is decaffeinated tea or herb tea. I don't think that is going to keep me awake.

Perhaps, I should just give up and take a nap. When I wake up I can finish printing off the items I need for tomorrow. I'm too sleepy to focus on anything except a nap. I will be so glad when I find an apartment and can purchase a bed. Sleeping on the couch is less painful then on my mattress, but I don't think I'm getting the proper amount of sleep. Maybe being sleepy has more to do with resting then the proper amount of sleep.

I haven't had any dreams I could remember for a couple of weeks. I rest better when I remember my dreams, even if those dreams are confusing. I think I will close this entry, turn off the television, and lay down for another nap. At least, I will after putting the spaghetti I made for lunch in the refrigerator.

Thoughts about my Medication

Istiqlál (Independence), 4 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Friday, April 12, 2013 about 8:45 AM Pacific Daylight Time

I found two empty pillboxes today, one is clear so that I can see the tablets I put in and the other is white and I have to open each compartment to see what medication I put inside. The clear box I use for my morning medication and the other I use for my evening prescriptions. My doctor also wants me to take some vitamins or rather minerals for my knees, I believe I need another pillbox for those.

It is easier to remember to take my medication if I have them in pillboxes rather then the prescription bottles. If the tablets are in the daily compartments in the pillboxes then I can look to make sure I took that day's prescription. If I leave all the pills in the bottles then sometimes I forget to take the pills at the proper time or I think I took a pill when I forgot.

I found two of Mom's pillboxes, so I do not have to buy new ones for my vitamins or minerals. I washed the two that belonged to Mom out and when they dry I will put the vitamins and minerals in them. That way, I can carry them with me in my purse so that I can take them if I eat out. If I do not eat out, then I can put the pillboxes close to where I eat and I can remember to take them with my meal.

Is my problem dust or seasonal allergies?

Istijlál (Majesty), 3 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Thursday, April 11, 2013 about 5:35 PM Pacific Daylight Time

It's spring and my sinuses are clogged. Of course, I don't have either tissues or medication in the house. At least, I don't think I have any allergy medication in the house. I can't find any in the medicine cabinet or on the coffee table. I'll check in Mom's room or rather the master bedroom to see if I took the bottle in there.

My sinuses weren't clogged until I took everything out of the hall closet, so it could be dust. I still need an over-the-counter allergy medication to take care of it. Unfortunately, purchasing that medication is out of the question for a while. I'm so short on funds that I can't purchase anything until the end of the month.

Having the brakes on the car fixed this month put me in a bind, but they had to be fixed. My Kia is easy on gas, but I still have to be careful how much I drive. At this point, I have exactly $0.09 in pennies, so I can't purchase either tissues or allergy medication. I don't remember taking all the allergy medication; perhaps I can find it somewhere in this house.

Weary Wednesday: Why am I tired today?

‘Idál (Justice), 2 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Wednesday, April 10, 2013 about 12:45 PM Pacific Daylight Time

I'm tired and sleepy today, but I'm not sure why. I got as much sleep last night as ever, I woke up every hour on the half hour until the alarm went off. I'm not sure why I set an alarm because I would have woke up at 4:30 AM  without an alarm. Not only am I tired, but for some reason the day is passing slowly and seems extremely long.

I should be used to daylight savings time by now. Apparently, I'm not because the day seems long. I cannot believe it is just 12:45 PM because it seems as if it should be later then that. I shouldn't gripe, the longer the day the more I will accomplish. At least that is the theory; however, theories work better as theories then in real life.

The problem is that when I lay down to take a nap I can't go to sleep. There is no use laying in bed if I can't sleep. I didn't take one of my meds yesterday, so that could be the reason I'm tired. In addition, I didn't eat before I left the house on Tuesday. That could be another reason I'm tired.

I'll have to mix some dry milk so I have something to put on my cereal. That way I can eat something before I leave the house, which I'll have to do either on Thursday or Friday. I'll see if eating before I go out to do business helps.

Learning to use my new cell phone

Fiḍál (Grace), 1 Jalál (Glory), 170 BE - Tuesday, April 9, 2013 about 8:55 AM Pacific Daylight Time

I attended the Feast of Glory last night. The host called me to let me know the Feast was scheduled for 7:30 PM instead of 7:00 PM and I realized I had not given him my new phone number. I give the host my new number last night, but this morning I have to call the Baha'i Center to make sure I e-mailed to the Center.

This morning, I am putting my contacts into the new phone. This is a long process because I have thirty or thirty-five contact in the phone's memory. I am not going to put all of them in the new phone because I no longer need to contact people who cared for Mom. Even without transferring all of them it is still a long process.

There is one number, in the old phone that I did not save with a name. I do not remember why the number is in the phone without a name. I know I had a reason at the time I put it in, but I do not remember when or why. I suspect I presumed that I would be able to remember the name and the reason I kept the number. I am not sure whether to call the number to find out who it belongs to or just drop it from my list. I know that from now on I will put names or at least initials with the number I put in my phone's memory.

The Second Monday in April

Kamál (Perfection), 19 Bahá (Splendor), 170 BE - Monday, April 8, 2013 about 2:25 PM Pacific Daylight Time

April is passing swiftly. It is the second week and I feel rushed. I feel as if I have not accomplished anything, but that is not true. I washed the dishes and a load of clothes this morning. This afternoon, even though it is cloudy and rainy in Las Vegas, I washed my hair. Normally I do not like washing my hair on a rainy day because it takes so long to dry. I do not use a blow dryer, I have one, it is in the car.

When I put the blow dryer in the car, I intended to put it in the storage unit; however, I changed my mind because I thought I might use it. I guess I should bring it into the house, the problem is that I do not like to use a blow dryer. I would rather let my hair dry naturally then damage it with the hot air from the dryer.

The beginning of the Second Week in April 2013

Jamál (Beauty), 18 Bahá (Splendor), 170 BE - Sunday, April 7, 2013 about 8:10 AM Pacific Daylight Time

It is the beginning of the second week in April 2013 and a beautiful day in Las Vegas. The beginning of a new week is always a joyous occasion because the next six day have so much potential for achievement. I have a great deal to accomplish this week because I want to take some items to the storage unit.

Now that the car is safe to drive I can load it with more items. I still do not know how I am going to get the dining room table to the storage unit because it will not fit in the car. I cannot hire a truck this month because my budget is tight. I am still not sure how I am going to pay for the prescription  I have to purchase on Tuesday. I have enough of the tablets to last  until Tuesday and since I cannot skip a dose, I need to turn the prescription in on Monday so that I can pick it up on Tuesday.

I have enough in my checking account to cover the items scheduled to come out this month. Having the car fixed on Friday put a dent in my budget, but it could not be helped. Now the car is safe to drive, but that does not help my April budget. I will have to find the money somewhere because I need the prescription.

Recyclable Saturday: Learning to accept my physical limitation

Jalál (Glory), 17 Bahá (Splendor), 170 BE - Saturday, April 6, 2013 about 2:25 PM Pacific Daylight Time

This is recyclable day in my neighborhood. This morning I carried three recyclable bins to the curb. Because I missed taking the recyclables out two weeks ago, I had two containers of newspapers. Those were the heaviest and after I finished lugging them to to curb the osteoarthritis in my knees began acting up. I ignored the pain and carried the recyclable bin containing cans and plastic items.

After I came back into the house, I had to fix something to eat so that I could take a pain pill. I take prescription pain medication and I cannot take the tablets without eating. The pain has subsided, but I am stiff and it is difficult to walk. I think I had better start accepting my physical limitations, but I do not want to give up recycling. I take out the recyclables again in two weeks, but I will not have as many newspapers.

The First Friday in April

Istiqlál (Independence), 16 Bahá (Splendor), 170 BE - Friday, April 5, 2013 about 6:10 PM Pacific Daylight Time

It is the first Friday in April, I spent the morning in my mechanic's reception area because of the breaks and a loose bolt in the wheels. I can now drive my car safely, the problem is that I cannot afford go anywhere. I am a little concerned because I just checked my bank account and found out that I may have miscalculated. It is possible I do not have a problem because I have some aluminum cans to sell and some money in the savings I can transfer to the checking account.

I had planned to wait until Monday to sell the cans, but I think I will sell them on Saturday morning. I can sell the aluminum cans and then get to the bank before it closes at 1:00 PM. Since the money I have to deposit I have to go into the bank because the ATM will not accept change. However, that is all right because it will encourage me to get up when the alarm sounds rather then lying in bed.

It is the first Friday in April, I have to stay home the rest of the month because I cannot afford to go out. This could be a good thing, I may be able to get more accomplished around the house. The only issue about staying home is figuring out a menu. I may be eating macaroni and cheese for the rest of the month. That could be a good thing, at least cheese is protein. I guess I could make grilled cheese sandwiches with the bread I have.

A Mudgy Memory

‘Idál (Justice), 14 Bahá (Splendor), 170 BE - Wednesday, April 3, 2013 about 5:35 AM Pacific Daylight Time

I am reading The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion. In Chapter 11, Ms Didion writes about her daughter, Quintana, using the word mudgy to refer to her sketchy memory about her stay in a hospital. The word Quintana meant was smudgy, as I was reading I realized that mudgy was a good description of some of my memory issues.

Since November 29, 2012, I have dealt with mudgy memories, memories that seemed to be missing pieces that should be there. I think back to the day, weeks, and months before Mom passed. I try to determine if I encountered the same issues then, but I don't think I did. I think the missing memory sections began after Mom passed.

I am frightened! Mom had Alzheimer's disease and I am afraid that the memory issues may be more the simply the stress of Mom's passing. I am afraid that the memory issues may be a sign of the disease that took Mom's memory. I hope and I pray that my mudgy memory is just a sign of stress and that once I have learned to deal with the stress issues my memory will be back to normal.

Overcome the morning blues

Fiḍál (Grace), 13 Bahá (Splendor), 170 BE - Tuesday, April 2, 2013 about 10:20 AM Pacific Daylight Time

I have finally overcome the morning blues; however, it took a bit of work this morning. After saying my morning prayers, reading a scripture verse, composing entries for my writing.com blog, and making an entry in my offline journal I am over the blues. In fact, the rest of the day looks bright.

I still have to fold the towels when I take them out of the dryer. I also have to decide what I am going to eat for the week. I do not have any meat in the house, I think I will make some macaroni or perhaps spaghetti. I still have three cans of spaghetti sauce in the pantry. I also have cheese in the refrigerator, so I could make macaroni and cheese.

The macaroni and cheese sounds better then the spaghetti. I had spaghetti twice last week, perhaps something a bit different this week. I can mix a can of green beans with the macaroni and fix another batch of cornbread. Right now the only type of bread in the house is cornbread; this way I have to fix macaroni and cheese rather then a grilled cheese sandwich.

It is going to be a good day. I have overcome the morning blues. I have the ingredients for my favorite food, macaroni and cheese, in the house. I have a half-empty trashcan in the garage so I can clean out the refrigerator this afternoon.

Insomnia on April Fools Day

Kamál (Perfection), 12 Bahá (Splendor), 170 BE - Monday, April 1, 2013 about 1:05 AM Pacific Daylight Time

It is after midnight on Monday, April 1, 2013 and I cannot sleep. I have insomnia on April Fools Day. For the past two or three hours I have attempted to sleep without any luck. Since I cannot sleep, I may as well bet sitting at the computer, at least here I can accomplish something even if it is only a blog entry.

For two hours I have listened to the wind blow. I heard something rattling on the cement outside my house, so I got up and looked out the door. The wind was blowing an aluminum can across my driveway. I think it was a can, but it could have been some other piece of trash. I did not go outside to see what it was, all I saw was something white blowing across my driveway.

After I decided the aluminum can noise was not something dangerous, I went back to bed and attempted to go to sleep. No luck. I am awake. I cannot go back to sleep. Therefore, I have to do something else to fill the time. I could do dishes. I could do laundry. I could read. I could sit on the couch and watch television. Since I have a writing deadline approaching, I will post this blog entry and then work on the poem I need to finish by April 3.

March: A lion or a lamb?

Jamál (Beauty), 11 Bahá (Splendor), 170 BE - Sunday, March 31, 2013 about 3:05 PM Pacific Daylight Time

The wind is blowing this afternoon, but it is not roaring. March is not going out like a lion nor did it come in like a lion. March came in more like a disgruntled sheep then anything else. All month, the weather in Las Vegas has range from cool to nice; it never got too hot or too cold.

The wind blew, but not so bad that it knocked down trees . The wind blew hard enough to scatter trash along the side of the road, but not so hard as to get plastic trash bags caught in trees or oleander bushes. There were clouds, there was a bit of rain (at least, I remember finding a puddle in my driveway one morning).

All month the birds have sung and flitted from tree to tree. I just looked out my living room window and saw two bird flying across the sky. There is also a cloud that looks like a skeleton walking across the sky. That is the only clouds I see this afternoon. There is a strong breeze blowing because I see the limbs on the olive trees and pine tree waving. It is a nice day in Las Vegas.

The Last Saturday in March 2013

Jalál (Glory), 10 Bahá (Splendor), 170 BE - Saturday, March 30, 2013 about 5:50 PM Pacific Daylight Time

On the last Saturday in March,
the skies are partly cloudy
and the birds are singing in Las Vegas.

On the last Saturday in March,
the high temperatures are in the low 80s,
with low temperatures in the 60s.

On the Last Saturday in March,
the sun descends toward the west
while Las Vegas waits for Easter Sunday dawn.

A warm spring day in Las Vegas

Istiqlál (Independence), 9 Bahá (Splendor), 170 BE - Friday, March 29, 2013 about 6:25 P.M. Pacific Daylight Time

birds singing all day
a chilly morning becomes
a warm afternoon

This morning it was a bit chilly, without any clouds. This afternoon it warmed up and now the clouds are rolling in. After it warmed up, I went to the store to purchase a couple of things. I bought a chocolate bunny and some personal items. When I came home the car began making the odd noise again.

I am not sure what the problem is because it only makes the noise after I have driven the car for a while. I did not notice how long after I begin driving that the noise begins. It sort of sounds like metal on metal; unfortunately I will not have any money to take it to the mechanic until after April 3; however, I will call my mechanic on Monday to see what he says. I will avoid driving it this weekend and do stuff around the house.

on a warm spring day
it is nice to work at home
listening to birds

Midweek Reflections: Sleeping on the Couch

‘Idál (Justice), 7 Bahá (Splendor), 170 B.E. - Wednesday, March 27, 2013 about 10:55 A.M. Pacific Daylight Time

To say that I am tired of sleeping on the couch is an understatement. The problem is that I cannon sleep on any bed in this house and get a pain free and good nights sleep. I know the problem is the mattress, but I am not sure why I have some much pain when I sleep on them. It is possible they are too hard because I know they are not too soft.

I can eat before I go to bed and take a pain pill, but that does not help when I sleep in on the mattresses. I am (as I think I have written before) in less pain when I sleep on the couch or the love seat then in a bed. I am planning on moving out of this house sometime this year, so I am going to wait until after I move to get a new bedroom set or at least a new bed.

Even sleeping on the couch I do not get a good nights sleep, I am in less pain so the sleep is more restful. However, I usually wake up two or three times during the night, which does not encourage a good nights sleep. The only thing I can do about waking up two or three times is to change my bedtime and go to bed later. That helps most of the time, but not all the time. There are still some nights when I wake up every hour.

The longest journey begins with a single step

Fiḍál (Grace), 6 Bahá (Splendor), 170 BE - Tuesday, March 26, 2013 about 1:30 PM Pacific Daylight Time

They say that the longest journey begins with a single step, so I begin the journey of improving my credit today. I joined Credit Karma. I found out my credit score, while the score was scary it was not as scary as not knowing. Now that I know my score, I can take steps to improve it. Joining Credit Karma is free and sign up is easy.

After I signed up, I kept a note of my log-in, password, security question, and the answer. There was a time when I thought I could remember all those things, but I have to admit that my memory may not be as good as I thought. I can to this conclusion because the last time I signed into my bank account, on a different computer then I normally use, the website ask me my security question. I panicked when I had difficulty remember it, I did not forget the answer I just forgot how I spelled it. It took me a couple of second to remember. Therefore, from now on I keep a hand written copy of my answers.

Celebrating Naw-Ruz

Istijlál (Majesty), 1 Bahá (Splendor), 170 BE - Thursday, March 21, 2013 about 2:10 PM Pacific Daylight Time

I went to the Naw-Ruz celebration last night at the Baha'i Center in Las Vegas. The first person I thought about when I walked in the door was my mother. Mom always enjoyed Naw-Ruz celebrations. When ever Mom and I went to a celebration, Mom always smiled because she was so happy. I enjoyed the celebration, I know Mom would have enjoyed the celebration this year as she as well.

I know that I will never be able to attend a Holy Day celebration or a nineteen-day Feast without think of my Mother. I am amazed at how many memories of the Feast and Holy Day celebrations are center around Mom. I became a Baha'i several years before Mom declared, but the ones I remember best are those that Mom and I attended together.

I cried last night because I missed Mom. I will cry at other Holy Day celebrations and Feast because I miss Mom. I will continue to attend because eventually the tears will stop and all I will remember are the good times Mom and I had together.

Why am I worried?

Kamál (Perfection), 17 ‘Alá’ (Loftiness), 169 BE - Monday, March 18, 2013 about 10:30 AM Pacific Time

Why am I worried? I think I did everything I could, so now I just have to wait for the agency I contacted to call me, but I am still worried. Why am I worried? I am worried because of the electric bill. Specifically, I am worried about the power company turning off the electricity.

I contacted the proper agency, which help senior citizens with these problems. No one has gotten back to me yet; however, it may be that they still need to process my information. I hope they get back to me before March 21 because that is the deadline to pay t he bill. I put the request in online (which is the only way those request are taken). I returned the e-mail application the agency sent me and now I am waiting for a phone call to let me know when my appointment is scheduled.

I know I should have contacted the agency earlier; however, I did not, so I just have to deal with the consequences of my actions and of being financially poor. In the mean time, I cannot focus on the worry because it will hide any other actions I can take. In addition, I will work online while I still have electricity and an internet connection. I will also pray, because prayer will assist in finding any other solution available.

To nap or not to nap that is the question

Istiqlál (Independence), 14 ‘Alá’ (Loftiness), 169 B.E. - Friday, March 15, 2013 about 12:40 P.M. Pacific Daylight Time

Today I got sleepy about 12:30 P.M. The same thing happened yesterday as well. I should take a nap, but if I doze I will not get anything accomplished this afternoon. I have too much to do to take a nap, at least a long nap. I might attempt a short one, the problem with afternoon naps is that they last longer then expected.

I could have another cup of coffee, it might or might not wake me up. I know coffee does not prevent me from going to sleep at night. Even if I drink a cup before I lay down it does not keep me awake. I have some grape juice in the refrigerator, which might keep me awake. Sugar will keep me awake before black coffee. I am not going to put sugar in my coffee, but I could try some chocolate in a cup.

To nap or not to nap, that is the question (sorry Shakespeare). Do I want take the chance of over napping? I am not sure a nap would help and it would cut down on the amount of work I accomplished this afternoon. Maybe I will just sit on the couch with my prayer book and meditate rather then take a nap. That way if I go to sleep, at least I will have accomplished something.

Reflections on the Season: Spring

‘Idál (Justice), 12 ‘Alá’ (Loftiness), 169 B.E. - Wednesday, March 13, 2013 about 1:30 P.M. Pacific Time

The temperature is warmer, birds are singing, and trees growing leaves; at last, it is spring. I turned the thermostat down to 66 degrees a couple of days ago. The heat has not came on since I turned down the thermostat, so I think about Saturday or Sunday, if the heat does not come on again, I will turn the unit off entirely. There is no use it being on since the days are so nice here in Las Vegas.

I think I will plan a picnic for this weekend, I only have one appointment on Saturday and I can call to council it. The weather is too nice to remain in the house for long periods of time. True, I have a lot to do around the house; however, I am getting the urge to go on a picnic. I also want to visit Mom's grave and see how the cemetery looks in the spring. I know how it looks in the winter because Mom's funeral was in early December.

Mom always liked spring and picnics. She enjoyed listening to  the birds sing, watching the people in the park, and interacting with friends. Mom's 92nd birthday is March 19; maybe I will go to the cemetery that day.

Getting used to the time change

Fiḍál (Grace), 11 ‘Alá’ (Loftiness), 169 B.E. - Tuesday, March 12, 2013 about Sunset Pacific Daylight Time

Daylight Savings Time went into effect on Sunday, March 10, at 2:00 A.M. I am still getting used to the time change. It takes me about five or six days to get used to Daylight Savings Time because my internal clock thinks it should be earlier then what the time on my cell phone or computer shows.

I do not wear a watch anymore. I have not worn one since 2010, the watch I did have I gave to my mother when I bought the cell phone. Mom put the watch away somewhere and I have not been able to find it. I suppose by now the watch battery has corroded and when I do find it, if I find it, I will have to throw the watch away. Oh well, I am not going to worry about that because I may never find the watch.

I use the clock on my cell phone, which has its advantages and disadvantages. I cannot look at the time when I am driving, so I cannot worry whether the traffic is going to make me late for an appointment. When I drive, I  put my cell phone in my purse so I cannot  answer it when it rings. In the car my purse usually set on the floor of the passenger side and it is too far for me to reach to pick it up.

Feeling better on a lazy Sunday

Jamál (Beauty), 9 ‘Alá’ (Loftiness) - Sunday, March 10, 2013 about 1:15 P.M. Pacific Time

It is Sunday afternoon and I am feeling better then I felt this morning or yesterday. I was in a mental fog all day Saturday, I was depressed and did not accomplish much. This afternoon, the fog has lifted; the problem is that I do not know what caused the problem.  All though, it could be the fact that I am still in mourning for my mother.

I miss Mom so much and now that spring is arriving the feeling has increased. Mom's 92nd birthday will be March 19. I suspect that is the problem, I cannot celebrate it with her this year and I am not sure how I am going to celebrate the day or her life. The are certain days and seasons that seem to affect me more then others.

Spring was Mom's favorite season. Mom liked the sunshine, the flowers, and the warmer temperatures. Mom enjoyed going out to eat on her birthday. Mom enjoyed going to poetry readings, the nineteen-day Feasts, and Holy Day commemorations. Mom enjoyed getting in the car and riding around Las Vegas.

As I said, I am feeling better and the mental fog that concealed yesterday and this morning is gone. I want to cry and I want to eat strawberry pie. Strawberry pie was Mom's favorite desert. Mom also liked fried ice cream. I should eat one of Mom's favorite deserts on her birthday and then visit her grave.

The sound of rain in Las Vegas

Istiqlál (Independence), 7 ‘Alá’ (Loftiness), 169 B.E. - Friday, March 8, 2013 about 1:55 P.M. Pacific Time

It is raining in Las Vegas and it has been raining off and on all day. I was in the kitchen washing dishes and I heard a strange noise that sounded like water dripping. I checked under the sink to see if the pipes has sprung a leak, but that was not the problem. The sound I heard was rain hitting the roof of the patio, I had to laugh. It has been so long since we had a good rainstorm in Las Vegas that I forgot what water sounded like dripping of the patio roof.

the sound of raindrops
dripping off the metal roof
of the patio

Thankful Thursday: March 7, 2013

Istijlál (Majesty), 6 ‘Alá’ (Loftiness), 169 B.E. - Thursday, March 7, 2013 about 3:52 P.M. Pacific

Time Today I am thankful

1. that I was able to purchase The Year Of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion
2. that I was able to purchase a used clothes dryer because now the clothes are dried the same day I wash them
3. that I went to my grief counseling meeting last night
4. that I was able to pick up a free loaf of day old bread today
5. that I have a space heater to warm up the bathroom before I take a shower
6. that I had enough leftover coffee to warm up in the microwave today
7. that I have a copy of The Mourner's Bill of Rights
8. that it is not snowing here in Las Vegas
9. that the birds were singing this morning
10. that I found a box of light bulbs in the cupboard

Haibun-Haiku Tuesday: March in Las Vegas

Fiḍál (Grace), 4 ‘Alá’ (Loftiness), 169 B.E. - Tuesday, March 5, 2013 about 8:35 A.M. Pacific Time

scattered morning clouds
white ghost in a pale blue sky
birds and bright sunshine

March in Las Vegas is normally a pleasant time of year because the temperatures are not too warm or too cold. Sometimes there are strong, tree felling winds, but not this year. This year the winds are gently, leaf combing winds. March did not come in light a lion or a lamb.

March winds whispering
though olive, oak, and pine trees
birds sing joyfully

The old saying says that when March comes it like lion it will go out like a lamb; however, this year it felt more like a trotting horse. So there is no forecasting how it will go, all though it could go out the same way it came; unable to decided whether it wants to roar or bleat.

Free Write Sunday: Thoughts about Spring

Jamál (Beauty), 2 ‘Alá’ (Loftiness), 169 B.E. - Sunday, March 3, 2013 about 8:10 A.M. Pacific Time

This year, the vernal equinox and spring in the Northern Hemisphere occurs at Wednesday, March 20, at 7:04 A.M. (EDT), which is 10:04 A.M. (PDT).  At last, warmer weather or at least I hope it means warmer weather. The weather so far in 2013 has been weird or at least I think the weather we are experiencing is weird.

I am looking forward to warmer weather. I am looking forward to oak trees with green leaves. I am looking forward to moving to a new residence. I am looking forward to ice tea. I am looking forward to making sun tea.

The birds in my neighborhood are all ready proclaiming spring. Every morning when I go outside to pick up my newspaper a bird is singing. This morning it is a nightingale sing, but sometimes it is a sparrow or a mourning dove. This morning the wind is blowing scattering the dawn clouds, combing the weeds in my yard, and caressing the boughs of trees.

beautiful morning
clouds floating across the sky
sunshine and white clouds

Goal for the next 12 or 19 months

Istiqlál (Independence), 4 Ayyám-i-Há (The Days of Há, 169 B.E. - Friday, March 1, 2013 about 8:10 A.M. Pacific Time

I have problems posting to this blog on a regular basis. There are several reasons for this, one of the reasons is finding subjects and themes.  Then there is the issue of time and interruptions that occur regularly. Therefore, I have decided that the best way to handle these situations is to plan to post every other day. I will also use specific themes for each day. The following is a list of those themes and will begin with the next post.

Free Write Sunday
Quote of the Week Monday
Haibun-Haiku Tuesday
Midweek Reflections Wednesday
Thankful Thursday
Poetry form of the Week Friday
Recyclable Saturday