The ball is finally rolling, I signed the lease agreement for the new apartment this afternoon. I'm feeling more confident about moving then every before. I'm looking forward to a busy weekend of packing and changing addresses. I have a lot to do and I should be worried about everything I have to do, but I'm not.
Oddly enough, I'm not worried about anything this afternoon. I think signing the agreement took a lot off my shoulders, so that I can now focus on getting thing accomplished instead of worrying how much longer I will be in this house. I think I'll fix me a cup of hot tea and start making a "To Do List".
Moving into the new apartment will be fun. At least I hope it will be fun. I'm so excited right now that I can hardly think, but I have to focus because I have so much to do. I know that one thing I need to do is make a list of everything I have to put in my car. I also have to make a grocery list of the stuff I need to purchase to eat.
I'm rambling, but that's how I get when I'm excited. It's getting a bit chilly in this house so I have to put on another sweater or sweatshirt. I hope the new apartment is easy to keep warm without a big electric bill. I know I'll have to increase my income; however, I think I can do that if I just push myself to work and write a little harder and better.
I'll still be living in Las Vegas, so that will mean I won't be driving into town every two or three days to see a doctor. I need to finalize my budget and see what I have to purchase on a monthly basis. I haven't thought about this before and I knew I would have to face it. I'm a bit worried about handling a budget with just me because it's easier to budget for more then one person.
Friday, January 31, 2014
Friday Morning Shower
Istiqlál (Independence), 13 Sulṭán {Sovereignty}, 170 BE - Friday, January 31, 2014 about 7:15 am Pacific Standard Time
I look south, out of the living room window, and watch the charcoal rainclouds as the move across the desert sky. I noticed the clouds earlier, but I didn't realize that it rained until I took some trash out to the garage, saw the rain wet cement, and felt a few drops on my head.
This morning, the rain slipped up on me. It came silently, without the warning of thunder and lightning. That's the way showers come sometimes, the clouds drop their blessed water on the desert without announcing it's coming. It's a wonderful surprise when it happens because it shows that God has a sense of humor and gives us blessings without any warning of their approach.
charcoal gray rainclouds
angels escort each each raindrop
blessing the desert
As I glance out the window, I see white-gray clouds, charcoal gray, and blue sky. I think the rain may have passed, but it could rain again today or the sky could clear and become a beautiful post rainstorm blue. It's too early in the day to say what will happen and I don't have time to check the weather website right now. Maybe later in the day when I've finished writing and taking out all the trash.
I look south, out of the living room window, and watch the charcoal rainclouds as the move across the desert sky. I noticed the clouds earlier, but I didn't realize that it rained until I took some trash out to the garage, saw the rain wet cement, and felt a few drops on my head.
This morning, the rain slipped up on me. It came silently, without the warning of thunder and lightning. That's the way showers come sometimes, the clouds drop their blessed water on the desert without announcing it's coming. It's a wonderful surprise when it happens because it shows that God has a sense of humor and gives us blessings without any warning of their approach.
charcoal gray rainclouds
angels escort each each raindrop
blessing the desert
As I glance out the window, I see white-gray clouds, charcoal gray, and blue sky. I think the rain may have passed, but it could rain again today or the sky could clear and become a beautiful post rainstorm blue. It's too early in the day to say what will happen and I don't have time to check the weather website right now. Maybe later in the day when I've finished writing and taking out all the trash.
Thursday, January 30, 2014
Thankful Thursday: January 30, 2014
Istijlál (Majesty), 12 Sulṭán (Sovereignty), 170 BE - Thursday, January 30, 2014 about 11:02 am Pacific Standard Time
On this last Thankful Thursday in January 2014 I am grateful...
1. ...for the whole bean Kona coffee I purchase last year because I had enough left in the bag to make coffee after my I ran out of my regular preground coffee.
2. ...for the chilly January days because they makes me appreciate spring and summer temperatures.
3. ...for what little patience I have left anymore because it makes waiting more tolerable.
4. ...that I earned enough Gift Points to extend my writing.com premium membership another three months to June 30, 2014.
5. ...that I have enough money to purchase some cooking oil so that I can have fried eggs. I have to check the ingredients to find out the potassium content in the oil, but I can afford to purchase the oil.
6. ...that I have enough gas in my car to get me to the bank, the grocery store, and the gas station today.
7. ...that I am learning to deal with my hoarder tendencies and as well as learning to downsize.
8. ...that I feel better physically and emotionally today then I did earlier in January.
9. ...that I am able to afford the co-pays for my medication.
10. ...that I have a working Internet connection so that I can research the affect of my medication on my low potassium diet.
On this last Thankful Thursday in January 2014 I am grateful...
1. ...for the whole bean Kona coffee I purchase last year because I had enough left in the bag to make coffee after my I ran out of my regular preground coffee.
2. ...for the chilly January days because they makes me appreciate spring and summer temperatures.
3. ...for what little patience I have left anymore because it makes waiting more tolerable.
4. ...that I earned enough Gift Points to extend my writing.com premium membership another three months to June 30, 2014.
5. ...that I have enough money to purchase some cooking oil so that I can have fried eggs. I have to check the ingredients to find out the potassium content in the oil, but I can afford to purchase the oil.
6. ...that I have enough gas in my car to get me to the bank, the grocery store, and the gas station today.
7. ...that I am learning to deal with my hoarder tendencies and as well as learning to downsize.
8. ...that I feel better physically and emotionally today then I did earlier in January.
9. ...that I am able to afford the co-pays for my medication.
10. ...that I have a working Internet connection so that I can research the affect of my medication on my low potassium diet.
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Midweek Reflections: Downsizing and Letting Go
‘Idál (Justice), 11 Sulṭán (Sovereignty), 170 BE - Wednesday, January 29, 2014 about 8:35 am Pacific Standard Time
Downsizing is letting go! It's learning to live a simpler life, with fewer things and more joy. It's looking at past hoarding of objects never used or dresses never worn as selfish, especially when those things can be used by someone else or recycled. Downsizing is recycling by giving away what I don't or can't use to someone who needs it and can use the item.
Downsizing is letting go of the past. I'm letting go each time a decide to throw away or give away something that no longer holds my interest or is too big for my new residence. It's learning to place the situation in God's hands by releasing the worry of owning things that I can't or won't use in the near or distant future. It's a commitment to my soul by removing veils that hide the reflection of God's Glory from the world of matter.
Downsizing is a commitment to earth and to the future of humanity. I let go of the past. I let go of the hoarding tendency of my ego. It's a difficult process, but it's necessary. It's like a root canal that hurts for a few minutes, but once it's done the mouth of the patient feels relief, which eventually spreads to the rest of the person's body and spirit.
Downsizing is letting go! It's learning to live a simpler life, with fewer things and more joy. It's looking at past hoarding of objects never used or dresses never worn as selfish, especially when those things can be used by someone else or recycled. Downsizing is recycling by giving away what I don't or can't use to someone who needs it and can use the item.
Downsizing is letting go of the past. I'm letting go each time a decide to throw away or give away something that no longer holds my interest or is too big for my new residence. It's learning to place the situation in God's hands by releasing the worry of owning things that I can't or won't use in the near or distant future. It's a commitment to my soul by removing veils that hide the reflection of God's Glory from the world of matter.
Downsizing is a commitment to earth and to the future of humanity. I let go of the past. I let go of the hoarding tendency of my ego. It's a difficult process, but it's necessary. It's like a root canal that hurts for a few minutes, but once it's done the mouth of the patient feels relief, which eventually spreads to the rest of the person's body and spirit.
Tuesday, January 28, 2014
Tuesday Thoughts: Stop Fooling around and get busy
Fiḍál (Grace), 10 Sulṭán (Sovereignty), 170 BE - Tuesday, January 28, 2014 about 12:03 pm Pacific Standard Time
It's Tuesday afternoon, I have to stop fooling around and get busy. I haven't wasted the entire morning, but I haven't accomplished as much as I'd like. I still have to finish cleaning off one of the desk I'm taking with me when I move, which (I hope and pray) will be by the end of this month.
Time stands still
movement is thwarted
I feel
as if I am floating
in limbo.
I know that part of the problem is not feeling good or perhaps that is worrying. There is a worry lurking in the back of my mind and it won't let me focus on what I have to do. I'm not sure I can even name the anxiety that is hiding there, but I can feel it. It's like a cancer eating away at my peace of mind and curtailing my accomplishments. Therefore, I'm going to post this entry and then finish cleaning off the desk before I do anything else on line.
It's Tuesday afternoon, I have to stop fooling around and get busy. I haven't wasted the entire morning, but I haven't accomplished as much as I'd like. I still have to finish cleaning off one of the desk I'm taking with me when I move, which (I hope and pray) will be by the end of this month.
Time stands still
movement is thwarted
I feel
as if I am floating
in limbo.
I know that part of the problem is not feeling good or perhaps that is worrying. There is a worry lurking in the back of my mind and it won't let me focus on what I have to do. I'm not sure I can even name the anxiety that is hiding there, but I can feel it. It's like a cancer eating away at my peace of mind and curtailing my accomplishments. Therefore, I'm going to post this entry and then finish cleaning off the desk before I do anything else on line.
Monday, January 27, 2014
Monday Morning Epiphany: I Need to Purchase some 8 oz. coffee cups
Kamál (Perfection), 9 Sulṭán (Sovereignty), 170 BE - Monday, January 27, 2014 about 7:45 am Pacific Standard Time
My kidney doctor has put me on a low potassium diet, so I have to cut down on the amount of coffee I drink. Brewed coffee, which has 128 milligrams (mg.) of potassium, is on the low potassium food list, but only in 8 oz. servings. This morning I realized that I don't have any 8 oz. coffee cup in my house. I know this because my coffeemaker makes 5 cups, but when I pour the coffee into any of my cups I get between 3 to 4 cups before the coffee carafe is empty.Since the coffeemaker will hold five 8 oz. servings this means all my cups are larger then 8 oz.
Following the low potassium diet is essential if I want to slow the progress of my kidney disease. Therefore, I have to purchase some 8 oz. coffee cups and get rid of the large cups and mugs I have now. I only need one or two cups because I normally use only two different cups when I drink coffee. I do have some glass cups in the cupboard that (I think) are 8 oz. I was going to leave them here when I moved, but I think I'll get them down and take them with me. At least, that way I will have the something I can drink coffee out of without worrying about the size of the cup.
If the glass cups are larger then I'll have to purchase an 8 oz. cup sometime in February, which will tighten my already tight budget. Maybe I can find some a cup or two at one of the second hand stores. I don't care if it goes with the mismatched set of dishes I'm taking with me. It's been so long since I ate out of a matching set of dishes that it doesn't matter as long as I'm not eating off of plastic or paper plates.
My kidney doctor has put me on a low potassium diet, so I have to cut down on the amount of coffee I drink. Brewed coffee, which has 128 milligrams (mg.) of potassium, is on the low potassium food list, but only in 8 oz. servings. This morning I realized that I don't have any 8 oz. coffee cup in my house. I know this because my coffeemaker makes 5 cups, but when I pour the coffee into any of my cups I get between 3 to 4 cups before the coffee carafe is empty.Since the coffeemaker will hold five 8 oz. servings this means all my cups are larger then 8 oz.
Following the low potassium diet is essential if I want to slow the progress of my kidney disease. Therefore, I have to purchase some 8 oz. coffee cups and get rid of the large cups and mugs I have now. I only need one or two cups because I normally use only two different cups when I drink coffee. I do have some glass cups in the cupboard that (I think) are 8 oz. I was going to leave them here when I moved, but I think I'll get them down and take them with me. At least, that way I will have the something I can drink coffee out of without worrying about the size of the cup.
If the glass cups are larger then I'll have to purchase an 8 oz. cup sometime in February, which will tighten my already tight budget. Maybe I can find some a cup or two at one of the second hand stores. I don't care if it goes with the mismatched set of dishes I'm taking with me. It's been so long since I ate out of a matching set of dishes that it doesn't matter as long as I'm not eating off of plastic or paper plates.
Saturday, January 25, 2014
Reasons I am looking forward to moving
Jalál (Glory), 7 Sulṭán (Sovereignty), 170 BE - Saturday, January 25, 2014 about 8:00 am Pacific Standard Time
These are the reason I'm looking forward to moving...
1. ...no more going out before dawn or after sunset to roll the trashcan to the curb.
2. ...no more worrying about whether I have all the recyclable in the bins before carrying them to the curb.
3. ...no more worrying about falling down when I carry heavy recyclable bins to the curb.
4. ...only one bathroom to keep clean.
5. ...I can take a bath in a real bathtub instead of showing everyday.
6. ...I can do laundry once or twice a week when I take the cloths to the laundromat instead of feeling that I have to do them everyday because I have a washer and dryer in the house.
7. ...no more looking out my living room window and watching the weeds grow in my front yard because I can't pull them myself or can't afford to pay someone to do it.
8. ...getting to know a new neighborhood and new neighbors.
9. ...having only a studio apartment to clean and take care of instead of six rooms and two bathrooms.
10. ...having the choice to cooking food on a real stove or in a real oven.
These are the reason I'm looking forward to moving...
1. ...no more going out before dawn or after sunset to roll the trashcan to the curb.
2. ...no more worrying about whether I have all the recyclable in the bins before carrying them to the curb.
3. ...no more worrying about falling down when I carry heavy recyclable bins to the curb.
4. ...only one bathroom to keep clean.
5. ...I can take a bath in a real bathtub instead of showing everyday.
6. ...I can do laundry once or twice a week when I take the cloths to the laundromat instead of feeling that I have to do them everyday because I have a washer and dryer in the house.
7. ...no more looking out my living room window and watching the weeds grow in my front yard because I can't pull them myself or can't afford to pay someone to do it.
8. ...getting to know a new neighborhood and new neighbors.
9. ...having only a studio apartment to clean and take care of instead of six rooms and two bathrooms.
10. ...having the choice to cooking food on a real stove or in a real oven.
Friday, January 24, 2014
Not Enough Time in The Day
There's not enough time in a day
to write everything I want to say
or do everything I want to do.
It's been a short day because I haven't gotten everything accomplished I wanted or needed to accomplish. I think part of the problem was depression and going to bed too early. Another part of the problem is wasting time playing silly games. I've tried several different ways to stop the game playing, but none of it seems to work. I think I'm going to take a different approach by opening my prayer book and reading one of the prayers for tests and difficulties each time I want to play a game.
There's not enough time in a day,
so why do I wail it away
playing wasting time games.
I still have a lot to do tonight before I go to the couch (I don't have a bed so I sleep on my couch), which could be one reason I'm not sleeping properly. However, I can't find a comfortable and pain free mattress, so the only place I can sleep with out waking up in pain is on the couch. Of course, when I move to the new apartment I won't be sleeping on the couch. Instead I'll be sleeping on the love seat because the I'm moving to a studio apartment and the couch takes up too much room.
to write everything I want to say
or do everything I want to do.
It's been a short day because I haven't gotten everything accomplished I wanted or needed to accomplish. I think part of the problem was depression and going to bed too early. Another part of the problem is wasting time playing silly games. I've tried several different ways to stop the game playing, but none of it seems to work. I think I'm going to take a different approach by opening my prayer book and reading one of the prayers for tests and difficulties each time I want to play a game.
There's not enough time in a day,
so why do I wail it away
playing wasting time games.
I still have a lot to do tonight before I go to the couch (I don't have a bed so I sleep on my couch), which could be one reason I'm not sleeping properly. However, I can't find a comfortable and pain free mattress, so the only place I can sleep with out waking up in pain is on the couch. Of course, when I move to the new apartment I won't be sleeping on the couch. Instead I'll be sleeping on the love seat because the I'm moving to a studio apartment and the couch takes up too much room.
Thursday, January 23, 2014
Thankful Thursday: January 23, 2014
Istijlál (Majesty), 5 Sulṭán (Sovereignty), 170 BE - Thursday, January 23, 2014 about 7:30 am Pacific Standard Time
This morning I am thankful...
1. ...for the organic salad I purchased at Smith's Food and Drug store yesterday. I can have a green salad this afternoon with my grilled cheese sandwich.
2. ...for hot coffee to sip while I am typing this entry because each sip of that hot ambrosia gives me a chance to contemplate my next gratitude statement.
3. ...that there is blue sky peeking between the scattered clouds that are floating in the sky above Las Vegas.
4. ...that yesterday, I received a list of foods low in potassium from the kidney specialist I saw on Monday. I can now get my new diet started with any further delay.
5. ...that coffee is one of the beverages low on potassium because I do not have to give it up or be overly careful about drinking it.
6. ...for the beautiful sunshine that is casting shadows across my front yard and onto the roof of the garage. I will miss that sight when I move into my new apartment.
7. ...that I rolled the trashcan to curb on Tuesday night instead of waiting until Wednesday morning because otherwise I would not have enough room for the trash I am taking out today.
8. ...that cranberry juice cocktail is on the low potassium list because that is one of my favorite none caffeine liquid refreshments.
9. ...that I was able to get my car tag yesterday at the Las Vegas Department of Motor Vehicles on East Sahara Ave.
10. ...for the slight breeze blowing though the neighbor's olive tree because the limbs appear to be waving at me.
This morning I am thankful...
1. ...for the organic salad I purchased at Smith's Food and Drug store yesterday. I can have a green salad this afternoon with my grilled cheese sandwich.
2. ...for hot coffee to sip while I am typing this entry because each sip of that hot ambrosia gives me a chance to contemplate my next gratitude statement.
3. ...that there is blue sky peeking between the scattered clouds that are floating in the sky above Las Vegas.
4. ...that yesterday, I received a list of foods low in potassium from the kidney specialist I saw on Monday. I can now get my new diet started with any further delay.
5. ...that coffee is one of the beverages low on potassium because I do not have to give it up or be overly careful about drinking it.
6. ...for the beautiful sunshine that is casting shadows across my front yard and onto the roof of the garage. I will miss that sight when I move into my new apartment.
7. ...that I rolled the trashcan to curb on Tuesday night instead of waiting until Wednesday morning because otherwise I would not have enough room for the trash I am taking out today.
8. ...that cranberry juice cocktail is on the low potassium list because that is one of my favorite none caffeine liquid refreshments.
9. ...that I was able to get my car tag yesterday at the Las Vegas Department of Motor Vehicles on East Sahara Ave.
10. ...for the slight breeze blowing though the neighbor's olive tree because the limbs appear to be waving at me.
Wednesday, January 22, 2014
Midweek Reflections: A New Solar Day Has Begun
Istijlál (Majesty), 5 Sulṭán (Sovereignty), 170 BE - Wednesday, January 22, 2014 about 6:18 pm Pacific Standard Time
The sun has sit
behind the western peaks
and a new solar day
has begun.
The days are getting longer and the nights shorter. I seems like just a couple of days ago it got dark about 3:30 or 4:00 pm and now the sun is setting between 4:30 and 5:00 pm. If I go outside tonight, I'm not sure if I will see the stars with I look up or clouds. All day the clouds have moved across the sky above Las Vegas and I've felt chilly.
The nigh pass slowly,
I wonder what morning
will bring.
I'll be moving out of this house soon and into a studio apartment. I'm a bit nervous about the move and the location, but I don't plan to stay there more the twelve months. I'm hoping a senior apartment will open up and I'll be able to move in when the lease on the studio is up. In the mean time, my living quarters and my budget will be cramped.
The sun has sit,
dawn is several hours away
as I inhale the air
of a new solar day.
The sun has sit
behind the western peaks
and a new solar day
has begun.
The days are getting longer and the nights shorter. I seems like just a couple of days ago it got dark about 3:30 or 4:00 pm and now the sun is setting between 4:30 and 5:00 pm. If I go outside tonight, I'm not sure if I will see the stars with I look up or clouds. All day the clouds have moved across the sky above Las Vegas and I've felt chilly.
The nigh pass slowly,
I wonder what morning
will bring.
I'll be moving out of this house soon and into a studio apartment. I'm a bit nervous about the move and the location, but I don't plan to stay there more the twelve months. I'm hoping a senior apartment will open up and I'll be able to move in when the lease on the studio is up. In the mean time, my living quarters and my budget will be cramped.
The sun has sit,
dawn is several hours away
as I inhale the air
of a new solar day.
Tuesday, January 21, 2014
Thought on a Cloudy Tuesday Morning
Fiḍál (Grace), 3 Sulṭán (Sovereignty), 170 BE - Tuesday, January 21, 2014 about 10:14 am Pacific Standard Time
I went to the kidney specialist yesterday, he told me that my kidneys are functioning at about 50% of normal. He also told me, that while I can't restore the lost function, I can slow the lose of function down, which is what I'm going to attempt to do. I have another appointment with this doctor in March and I have to get a blood test at his office in February.
I also have seven other doctor's appointments in February, which makes moving to Searchlight less of an option then it was. The appointments I have cover a four week period with two appointments a week. If I drive to Las Vegas and back to Searchlight that puts me and my car on the road for at least four hours each day. I'm not sure either the car or I could stand the stress. However, I'm getting flack about the apartment I decided to move to in Las Vegas, which increase the stress over moving.
All I want to do is move into the apartment and get my everything situated so that I have less stress. I'm beginning to doubt that here will ever be less stress in my life. Until recently, I thought I was a competent adult and capable of making my own decisions, but I'm beginning to wonder about that; especially with all the flack I'm getting.
I'm almost tempted to find an assisted living place where I have someone to watch over me at all times. At least, then I wouldn't be getting all this flack and no one would have to worry about me. All right, that's not a good idea, but I'm tempted. I'd be a lot less stressed if I wasn't getting as much flack. At this point, I think the best thing to do is stick by my decisions despite. All I need to do is stand up for myself and make my views clear to everyone giving me flack.
I went to the kidney specialist yesterday, he told me that my kidneys are functioning at about 50% of normal. He also told me, that while I can't restore the lost function, I can slow the lose of function down, which is what I'm going to attempt to do. I have another appointment with this doctor in March and I have to get a blood test at his office in February.
I also have seven other doctor's appointments in February, which makes moving to Searchlight less of an option then it was. The appointments I have cover a four week period with two appointments a week. If I drive to Las Vegas and back to Searchlight that puts me and my car on the road for at least four hours each day. I'm not sure either the car or I could stand the stress. However, I'm getting flack about the apartment I decided to move to in Las Vegas, which increase the stress over moving.
All I want to do is move into the apartment and get my everything situated so that I have less stress. I'm beginning to doubt that here will ever be less stress in my life. Until recently, I thought I was a competent adult and capable of making my own decisions, but I'm beginning to wonder about that; especially with all the flack I'm getting.
I'm almost tempted to find an assisted living place where I have someone to watch over me at all times. At least, then I wouldn't be getting all this flack and no one would have to worry about me. All right, that's not a good idea, but I'm tempted. I'd be a lot less stressed if I wasn't getting as much flack. At this point, I think the best thing to do is stick by my decisions despite. All I need to do is stand up for myself and make my views clear to everyone giving me flack.
Sunday, January 19, 2014
A Good Start to a New Week: Sunday, January 19, 2014
Jamál (Beauty), 1 Sulṭán (Sovereignty), 170 BE - Sunday, January 19, 2014 about 10:13 am Pacific Standard Time
Feast of Sovereignty
a good start to a new week
and to a new month.
I attended the Feast of Sulṭán last night. It was held in the home of a friend, who picked out some beautiful and spiritually charged readings. I am glad I attended feast because it changed my entire mood and cause me to feel better then I did yesterday afternoon.
The Feast of Sulṭán
a new nineteen days began
a joyful new month.
During the second portion of feast, I got an idea for a new piece of writing. I'm not sure yet whether the piece will be a story, a poem, or an essay because the only thing I have is the title. The tentative or working title is "Spiritual Climate Change". At this point, I think I will make it about spiritual transformation, but I could also use it as a metaphor for the physical climate change Earth is going through right now. I will have to say some prayers and meditate on this subject.
Feast of Sovereignty
a good start to a new week
and to a new month.
I attended the Feast of Sulṭán last night. It was held in the home of a friend, who picked out some beautiful and spiritually charged readings. I am glad I attended feast because it changed my entire mood and cause me to feel better then I did yesterday afternoon.
The Feast of Sulṭán
a new nineteen days began
a joyful new month.
During the second portion of feast, I got an idea for a new piece of writing. I'm not sure yet whether the piece will be a story, a poem, or an essay because the only thing I have is the title. The tentative or working title is "Spiritual Climate Change". At this point, I think I will make it about spiritual transformation, but I could also use it as a metaphor for the physical climate change Earth is going through right now. I will have to say some prayers and meditate on this subject.
Saturday, January 18, 2014
Saturday Thoughts: January 18, 2014
Jalál (Glory), 18 Sharaf (Honor), 170 BE - Saturday, January 18, 2014 about 1:54 pm Pacific Standard Time
It isn't the Monday blues
that has me sad,
but the Saturday blahs
I'm not sure why I'm down this afternoon, maybe I need to go outside and stand in the sun. I backed the car out of the garage about 12:30 pm because I think I'm going to the Feast of Sultan this evening, but I could change my mind by the time 6:00 pm arrives. It isn't that I don't want to go to the nineteen-day feast or that I don't have enough gas in the car to get there.
Right now, the problem is the blahs, I just don't want to do anything. I'm not even sure I want to write anymore today and that isn't like me. Normally, I want to write no matter how I feel, what I'm doing, or what I have to do. I'm not sure what's wrong except I have the Saturday afternoon blahs and I want to cry.
If I were sleepy
a little nap would help
refresh and energize,
but I'm not sleepy...
I have the blahs.
Since writing about how I feel doesn't seem to be helping, I think I will close t his entry, go wash the dishes, and see if that helps. Maybe making the paperwork out for my doctor's appointment on Monday would hep.
It isn't the Monday blues
that has me sad,
but the Saturday blahs
I'm not sure why I'm down this afternoon, maybe I need to go outside and stand in the sun. I backed the car out of the garage about 12:30 pm because I think I'm going to the Feast of Sultan this evening, but I could change my mind by the time 6:00 pm arrives. It isn't that I don't want to go to the nineteen-day feast or that I don't have enough gas in the car to get there.
Right now, the problem is the blahs, I just don't want to do anything. I'm not even sure I want to write anymore today and that isn't like me. Normally, I want to write no matter how I feel, what I'm doing, or what I have to do. I'm not sure what's wrong except I have the Saturday afternoon blahs and I want to cry.
If I were sleepy
a little nap would help
refresh and energize,
but I'm not sleepy...
I have the blahs.
Since writing about how I feel doesn't seem to be helping, I think I will close t his entry, go wash the dishes, and see if that helps. Maybe making the paperwork out for my doctor's appointment on Monday would hep.
Friday, January 17, 2014
It's Friday and I'm still catching up from Wednesday
Istiqlál (Independence), 18 Sharaf, 170 BE - Friday, January 17, 2014 about 11:08 am Pacific Standard Time
It's Friday,
I'm still catching up from Wednesday
inactivity and nothing accomplished day.
It's Friday, I'm having difficulties focusing on what I have to do. I have sheets in the dryer to fold. I have trash to carry out to the garage. I have boxes to go through and empty. I have to decide what furniture I can fit into my studio apartment. I have writing projects to work on. I have to get a few of these things accomplished today because tomorrow I have to get my car tag renewed.
It's Friday,
the only thing I want to do
is stand outside in the sun.
It's Friday, I posted to this blog yesterday so I don't have to post to it today. However, the only things I can concentrate on are prayers and writing. I've almost finished the fresh coffee I made today, so I have to decide if I want to brew another carafe, warm up the apple juice, or fix myself a cup of hot chocolate. Since I've drink one cup of cafe mocha this morning, I should warm up the apple juice.
It's Friday,
I'm distracted
I can't concentrate
on the things I have to do.
It's Friday, I think the best thing for me is to force myself to do what I have to do. I need to decide on something for lunch and I don't know what I want to eat. I think I'm just procrastinating because I can't concentrate on what I need to do. Therefore, I'll fix myself another cup of cafe mocha and force myself to do go through a box, take out the trash, or something.
It's Friday,
I'm still catching up from Wednesday
inactivity and nothing accomplished day.
It's Friday, I'm having difficulties focusing on what I have to do. I have sheets in the dryer to fold. I have trash to carry out to the garage. I have boxes to go through and empty. I have to decide what furniture I can fit into my studio apartment. I have writing projects to work on. I have to get a few of these things accomplished today because tomorrow I have to get my car tag renewed.
It's Friday,
the only thing I want to do
is stand outside in the sun.
It's Friday, I posted to this blog yesterday so I don't have to post to it today. However, the only things I can concentrate on are prayers and writing. I've almost finished the fresh coffee I made today, so I have to decide if I want to brew another carafe, warm up the apple juice, or fix myself a cup of hot chocolate. Since I've drink one cup of cafe mocha this morning, I should warm up the apple juice.
It's Friday,
I'm distracted
I can't concentrate
on the things I have to do.
It's Friday, I think the best thing for me is to force myself to do what I have to do. I need to decide on something for lunch and I don't know what I want to eat. I think I'm just procrastinating because I can't concentrate on what I need to do. Therefore, I'll fix myself another cup of cafe mocha and force myself to do go through a box, take out the trash, or something.
Thursday, January 16, 2014
Thankful Thursday: January 16, 2014
Istijlál (Majesty), 17 Sharaf (Honor), 170 BE - Thursday, January 16, 2014 about 11:30 am Pacific Standard Time
Today I am Thankful...
1. ...for the prayers revealed by Baha'u'llah. Every time I read or recite on of these prayers I feel the Holy Spirit flowing through it.
2. ...for a coffee maker that keeps my coffee hot all the time rather then switching off before I have finished drinking the coffee.
3. ...that I am able to wash my dishes by hand instead of using a dishwasher because the hot water helps the arthritis in my fingers.
4. ...for the warm sun on this late winter day because each time I take trash to the garage I can stand in the sun and feel the joy of its rays.
5. ...for the cranberry juice I have left in the refrigerator because, even on a chilly day, it tastes so good when I pour myself a cold glass.
6. ...that there is a gentle breeze blowing this morning because it causes the neighbor's olive tree to look as if it is waving at me.
7. ...for the chocolate chip cookies I had for breakfast this morning. I enjoyed them with a fresh cup of coffee.
8. ...for my five pet rocks because I can talk to them and I don't have to worry about remembering to feed, water, change their litter box, or take them for a walk.
9. ...that I found the hairbrush, I thought I had lost because I would rather brush my hair then comb it.
10. ...that I still live in Las Vegas where all my friends and doctors are located.
Today I am Thankful...
1. ...for the prayers revealed by Baha'u'llah. Every time I read or recite on of these prayers I feel the Holy Spirit flowing through it.
2. ...for a coffee maker that keeps my coffee hot all the time rather then switching off before I have finished drinking the coffee.
3. ...that I am able to wash my dishes by hand instead of using a dishwasher because the hot water helps the arthritis in my fingers.
4. ...for the warm sun on this late winter day because each time I take trash to the garage I can stand in the sun and feel the joy of its rays.
5. ...for the cranberry juice I have left in the refrigerator because, even on a chilly day, it tastes so good when I pour myself a cold glass.
6. ...that there is a gentle breeze blowing this morning because it causes the neighbor's olive tree to look as if it is waving at me.
7. ...for the chocolate chip cookies I had for breakfast this morning. I enjoyed them with a fresh cup of coffee.
8. ...for my five pet rocks because I can talk to them and I don't have to worry about remembering to feed, water, change their litter box, or take them for a walk.
9. ...that I found the hairbrush, I thought I had lost because I would rather brush my hair then comb it.
10. ...that I still live in Las Vegas where all my friends and doctors are located.
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
A Good Day to Write and Pray
It's a good day to write,
it's a good day to pray,
it's a good day to worship God
in any way.
It's a good Tuesday morning! I look out my window and see the beautiful blue sky, the shadows cast by the sun as it ascends over Sunrise Mountain, and watch the cars drive past my house. I wonder where the people in the cars are going this early in the morning. I know some of them are going to work, but the traffic is heavier in t his residential neighborhood then normal.
It's a good day to write
about the beauty of morning
and to worship God
through the written word.
I haven't seen anyone walking the children to school yet, but I did see a yellow school bus drive past. Therefore, I expect to see parents and groups of children going to the grade school that's about three or four blocks away. When I move, I'll miss looking out my living room window and seeing parents walking their children to school each weekday morning.
it's a good day to pray,
it's a good day to worship God
in any way.
It's a good Tuesday morning! I look out my window and see the beautiful blue sky, the shadows cast by the sun as it ascends over Sunrise Mountain, and watch the cars drive past my house. I wonder where the people in the cars are going this early in the morning. I know some of them are going to work, but the traffic is heavier in t his residential neighborhood then normal.
It's a good day to write
about the beauty of morning
and to worship God
through the written word.
I haven't seen anyone walking the children to school yet, but I did see a yellow school bus drive past. Therefore, I expect to see parents and groups of children going to the grade school that's about three or four blocks away. When I move, I'll miss looking out my living room window and seeing parents walking their children to school each weekday morning.
Monday, January 13, 2014
Monday Evening January 13, 2014
Fiḍál (Grace), 15 Sharaf (Honor), 170 BE - Monday, January 13, 2014 about 6:01 pm Pacific Standard Time
It's Monday evening and a new solar day has begun. As I sit here looking out my window into the darkness, I wonder what tomorrow will bring. It's been a stressful couple of weeks of packing and attempting to get a prescription I needed. I called the doctor's office myself this morning and picked up the prescription this afternoon, so I can begin taking it again on Tuesday morning.
This morning, I called in a prescription for my eye drops, which I hope I can pick up either Tuesday or Wednesday. I still have some stuff to pack tonight, but after the trip to the grocery store to pick up the prescription, nine cans of soup (the soup was three cans for $5.00 and I had an e-coupon on my customer card for $2.00), and a box of crackers I'm a bit tired. I'm also hungry so I think I'll open one of the cans of soup for my supper. I think a can of soup with a peanut butter sandwich sounds good.
I should have gotten another box of crackers, but since I'm going to be moving soon I didn't want to have too much stuff to put in the box of food. If I need another box of cracker, I'll purchase it when I pick up the eye drops (that is if I don't have to wait two weeks for that prescription). I hope I don't because I may be moving to Searchlight and it's difficult to get into Las Vegas on a daily basis.
It's Monday evening and a new solar day has begun. As I sit here looking out my window into the darkness, I wonder what tomorrow will bring. It's been a stressful couple of weeks of packing and attempting to get a prescription I needed. I called the doctor's office myself this morning and picked up the prescription this afternoon, so I can begin taking it again on Tuesday morning.
This morning, I called in a prescription for my eye drops, which I hope I can pick up either Tuesday or Wednesday. I still have some stuff to pack tonight, but after the trip to the grocery store to pick up the prescription, nine cans of soup (the soup was three cans for $5.00 and I had an e-coupon on my customer card for $2.00), and a box of crackers I'm a bit tired. I'm also hungry so I think I'll open one of the cans of soup for my supper. I think a can of soup with a peanut butter sandwich sounds good.
I should have gotten another box of crackers, but since I'm going to be moving soon I didn't want to have too much stuff to put in the box of food. If I need another box of cracker, I'll purchase it when I pick up the eye drops (that is if I don't have to wait two weeks for that prescription). I hope I don't because I may be moving to Searchlight and it's difficult to get into Las Vegas on a daily basis.
Sunday, January 12, 2014
I have a new five-cup coffeemaker
Jamál (Beauty), 13 Sharaf (Honor), 170 BE - Sunday, January 12, 2014 about 1:39 pm Pacific Standard Time
I went to the store on Saturday, January 11, to purchase some necessities and to check if a prescription was in. I have waited for over a week for the doctor to fax that prescription, so tomorrow I will have to call her again to see why. While I was at the grocery store I purchased some necessities and a new 5-cup coffeemaker to replace the 12-cup that stopped working.
I like the new coffeemaker better because it is smaller and does not have anything fancy, such as a clock or timer; neither of which I need on a coffeemaker. The only issue I have is the size of my coffee cups because they are bigger I get only three cups instead of the five. All though, that could be an advantage because now I stop drinking coffee when to carafe is empty and I do not have to heat leftover coffee in the microwave.
This coffeemaker does not turn off automatically, so I have to check it before leaving the house or going to bed at night. Normally, I turn it off after I empty the carafe, but I will have to check it to make sure because sometimes I encounter senior moments. Another thing I have to start doing is using the carafe to fill the coffee maker with water especially when I fill it in the morning before the sun comes up.
fresh cup of coffee
everyday without fail
and no leftovers
I went to the store on Saturday, January 11, to purchase some necessities and to check if a prescription was in. I have waited for over a week for the doctor to fax that prescription, so tomorrow I will have to call her again to see why. While I was at the grocery store I purchased some necessities and a new 5-cup coffeemaker to replace the 12-cup that stopped working.
I like the new coffeemaker better because it is smaller and does not have anything fancy, such as a clock or timer; neither of which I need on a coffeemaker. The only issue I have is the size of my coffee cups because they are bigger I get only three cups instead of the five. All though, that could be an advantage because now I stop drinking coffee when to carafe is empty and I do not have to heat leftover coffee in the microwave.
This coffeemaker does not turn off automatically, so I have to check it before leaving the house or going to bed at night. Normally, I turn it off after I empty the carafe, but I will have to check it to make sure because sometimes I encounter senior moments. Another thing I have to start doing is using the carafe to fill the coffee maker with water especially when I fill it in the morning before the sun comes up.
fresh cup of coffee
everyday without fail
and no leftovers
Saturday, January 11, 2014
A Joyful, Sorrowful, and Chilly Saturday Morning
Jalál (Glory), 12 Sharaf (Honor), 170 BE - Saturday, January 11, 2014 about 6:36 am Pacific Standard Time
On this joyful Saturday morning
I place my trust in God,
I know that the pink clouds of dawn
are the start of a glorious day.
On this sorrowful Saturday morning
I place my trust in God,
I am entering a new stage of life
I know that the sorrow I feel
is caused by leaving
the past behind.
On this chilly Saturday morning
I place my trust in God.
because no matter what the weather
I know that the Divine Essence
is there for me to lean on.
On this joyful Saturday morning
I place my trust in God,
I know that the pink clouds of dawn
are the start of a glorious day.
On this sorrowful Saturday morning
I place my trust in God,
I am entering a new stage of life
I know that the sorrow I feel
is caused by leaving
the past behind.
On this chilly Saturday morning
I place my trust in God.
because no matter what the weather
I know that the Divine Essence
is there for me to lean on.
Thursday, January 09, 2014
The Second Thankful Thursday of 2014
Istijlál (Majest), 10 Sharaf, 170 BE - Thursday, January 9, 2014 about 10:30 am Pacific Standard Time
Author's Note: I am composing this between episodes of packing because I have difficulty standing up for very long at a time.
On the second Thankful Thursday in 2014, I am thankful...
1. ...that I can stand up for five minutes without difficulty or without one of my legs falling asleep.
2. ...that I still have 219 minutes left to use on on my cell phone before Tuesday, January 21, 2014;
3. ...that my old computer still works after the scare I had this morning;
4. ...that I found a copy of The Seven Valleys and the Four Valleys by Baha'u'llah, which I can put in my purse;
5. ....that I found a clothes brush that belonged to my Grandma Mary when I was going through a file cabinet;
6. ...that I found a cigarette case that belonged to my Grandpa Frank when I was going through a file cabinet;
7. ...that I still have two cans of soup left so that I can have soup again on this cloudy Thursday;
8. ...that I found a penny when I was cleaning out a suitcase;
9. ...that I have electric clothes dryer to use on cloudy days;
10. ...for the prayers revealed by Baha'u'llah.
Author's Note: I am composing this between episodes of packing because I have difficulty standing up for very long at a time.
On the second Thankful Thursday in 2014, I am thankful...
1. ...that I can stand up for five minutes without difficulty or without one of my legs falling asleep.
2. ...that I still have 219 minutes left to use on on my cell phone before Tuesday, January 21, 2014;
3. ...that my old computer still works after the scare I had this morning;
4. ...that I found a copy of The Seven Valleys and the Four Valleys by Baha'u'llah, which I can put in my purse;
5. ....that I found a clothes brush that belonged to my Grandma Mary when I was going through a file cabinet;
6. ...that I found a cigarette case that belonged to my Grandpa Frank when I was going through a file cabinet;
7. ...that I still have two cans of soup left so that I can have soup again on this cloudy Thursday;
8. ...that I found a penny when I was cleaning out a suitcase;
9. ...that I have electric clothes dryer to use on cloudy days;
10. ...for the prayers revealed by Baha'u'llah.
Tuesday, January 07, 2014
And Then the Coffeemaker Stopped Working
Fidál (Grace), 8 Sharaf (Honor), 170 BE – Tuesday, January 07, 2014 about 12:22 pm Pacific Standard Time
When I fixed my breakfast, it took the microwave fifteen minutes to cook something that should have only taken eight to ten minutes. When I washed the dishes, one-half of the sink backed up while the dishwater was going down the drain. And the final straw of the day, the coffeemaker stopped working.
I suppose the next thing to go out will be the microwave, which will leave me with only the electric skillet. Without a microwave, I cannot reheat the leftover coffee in the carafe or heat water for instant coffee. I only hope and pray that the electric skillet keeps working until I find a new place and move.
There is an opening in Searchlight; unfortunately, it is beyond my budget especially since the utilities are all included. The house, mobile home, or apartment, whichever it is, is all-electric. The house I live in now, and am expecting to leave this month, is all-electric and the power bills are outrageous.
Even if I could figure out a way to afford both the rent and the power bill, I would have to give up the internet connection because I could not afford it. As it is, I may have to give up the internet connect and the internet when I move. If I can find a place I can afford, with the power bills I still have find a way to afford the internet connect or give it up. I suspect if I have to make a choice between paying the power bill and having an internet connection then the connection to the internet will have to go.
I just heard the mail carrier drop letters or something through my door slot, so I have to go see who wants money today. After that, I need to take out some more trash and see if the trashcan in the garage is full. I am posting this now and hoping it is not my last post.
When I fixed my breakfast, it took the microwave fifteen minutes to cook something that should have only taken eight to ten minutes. When I washed the dishes, one-half of the sink backed up while the dishwater was going down the drain. And the final straw of the day, the coffeemaker stopped working.
I suppose the next thing to go out will be the microwave, which will leave me with only the electric skillet. Without a microwave, I cannot reheat the leftover coffee in the carafe or heat water for instant coffee. I only hope and pray that the electric skillet keeps working until I find a new place and move.
There is an opening in Searchlight; unfortunately, it is beyond my budget especially since the utilities are all included. The house, mobile home, or apartment, whichever it is, is all-electric. The house I live in now, and am expecting to leave this month, is all-electric and the power bills are outrageous.
Even if I could figure out a way to afford both the rent and the power bill, I would have to give up the internet connection because I could not afford it. As it is, I may have to give up the internet connect and the internet when I move. If I can find a place I can afford, with the power bills I still have find a way to afford the internet connect or give it up. I suspect if I have to make a choice between paying the power bill and having an internet connection then the connection to the internet will have to go.
I just heard the mail carrier drop letters or something through my door slot, so I have to go see who wants money today. After that, I need to take out some more trash and see if the trashcan in the garage is full. I am posting this now and hoping it is not my last post.
Sunday, January 05, 2014
Things I’m Tired of
Jamál (Beauty), 6 Sharaf (Honor), 170 BE – Sunday, January 05, 2014 about 10:46 am Pacific Standard Time
These are some of the things I’m tired of dong...
1. ...washing dishes by hand everyday, I want a working dishwasher. Sometimes I enjoy washing dishes the old fashion way and sometimes I would like to put them in the dishwasher and wash them once every two or three days.
2. ...doing laundry everyday, I would like to do laundry once or twice a week, even if it meant going to a laundromat (which I’m usually not crazy about doing).
These are some of the things I’m tired of...
1. ...high power bills, because I’m on a fixed income and it’s difficult to pay them.
2. ...taking a bath in a cold bathroom because I’m attempt to keep the power bills down (I don’t think it’s working).
3. ...living in a house that is too big for me to take care off and feeling like a failure because I can’t keep it clean.
4. ...dentures that need relining when I can’t afford to have them relines.
5. ...having a bad hair day everyday because I need my hair done and can’t afford it because of the high power and other utility bills.
6. ...hearing weird noises that I can’t identify coming from inside or outside the house.
These are some of the things I’m tired of dong...
1. ...washing dishes by hand everyday, I want a working dishwasher. Sometimes I enjoy washing dishes the old fashion way and sometimes I would like to put them in the dishwasher and wash them once every two or three days.
2. ...doing laundry everyday, I would like to do laundry once or twice a week, even if it meant going to a laundromat (which I’m usually not crazy about doing).
These are some of the things I’m tired of...
1. ...high power bills, because I’m on a fixed income and it’s difficult to pay them.
2. ...taking a bath in a cold bathroom because I’m attempt to keep the power bills down (I don’t think it’s working).
3. ...living in a house that is too big for me to take care off and feeling like a failure because I can’t keep it clean.
4. ...dentures that need relining when I can’t afford to have them relines.
5. ...having a bad hair day everyday because I need my hair done and can’t afford it because of the high power and other utility bills.
6. ...hearing weird noises that I can’t identify coming from inside or outside the house.
Friday, January 03, 2014
A Bit of New Year’s Confusion
Istiqlál (Independence ),
4 Sharaf (Honor).170 BE – Friday, January 03, 2014 about 8:31 am Pacific
Standard Time
I encountered a bit of New Year’s confusion yesterday. I
intended to post the following Thankful Thursday entry in this blog: Thankful
Thursday: On the First Thankful Thursday of 2014. However, I posted it in Poet
999’s Thoughts about Writing and Other Stuff. I know what happened, when I went
to compose it in the blog I didn’t notice which blog I was working with.
I hope to overcome this issue by changing the way I make my
blog posts. I’m going to compose the post off line and, after the entry is
complete, copy and past it into the proper blog. I know this is going to take a
little more time, but I think it is worth it for two reasons. First, I’ll be
able to catch both my grammar and spell mistakes at the same time. Second,
there will be less confusion about which blog I’m posting the entry in.
Since I’m going to try having some of my poems and stories
published taking a little more time on all my writing projects is worth it. I
think that is all for today. I’m not sure which blog I will post to on
Saturday, January 4.
Wednesday, January 01, 2014
My Tentative Plans for the first quarter of 2014
‘Idál (Grace), 2 Sharaf (Honour), 170 BE - Wednesday, January 1, 2014 about 3:23 pm Pacific Standard Time
I plan to post in this blog every other day, I know there may be exceptions. Days when I post everyday or even skip the day I plan to post, but on average (at least for the first quarter of 2014); I am planning on posting every other day. I may post in the morning, afternoon, or evening depending on what is happening and which writing project I am working on in any given day.
I also plan on giving myself time every afternoon between 11:00 am and 1:00 pm for a nap. My nap time depends on external issues such as doctors appointments, grocery shopping, and other miscellaneous things I have to do outside the house. I find that when I am home, and writing, I get tired after I eat lunch, which is usually around 11:00 am.
If I go shopping or to a doctors appointment, I usually find myself getting sleepy when I get home. This is especially true if I go to the grocery store because walking up and down the aisles, even pushing a shopping cart, is tiring. I am not as young as I used to be and it takes more energy to do the things I could do easily when I was younger. However, I like walking down the aisles because I can see the items on the top shelves easier then riding a grocery store scouter or what ever you call those things that many seniors ride in the grocery store.
I plan to post in this blog every other day, I know there may be exceptions. Days when I post everyday or even skip the day I plan to post, but on average (at least for the first quarter of 2014); I am planning on posting every other day. I may post in the morning, afternoon, or evening depending on what is happening and which writing project I am working on in any given day.
I also plan on giving myself time every afternoon between 11:00 am and 1:00 pm for a nap. My nap time depends on external issues such as doctors appointments, grocery shopping, and other miscellaneous things I have to do outside the house. I find that when I am home, and writing, I get tired after I eat lunch, which is usually around 11:00 am.
If I go shopping or to a doctors appointment, I usually find myself getting sleepy when I get home. This is especially true if I go to the grocery store because walking up and down the aisles, even pushing a shopping cart, is tiring. I am not as young as I used to be and it takes more energy to do the things I could do easily when I was younger. However, I like walking down the aisles because I can see the items on the top shelves easier then riding a grocery store scouter or what ever you call those things that many seniors ride in the grocery store.
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