I’m fighting the down feeling today

Kamál (Perfection), 14 Rahmat (Mercy), 165 BE – Monday, July 7, 2008 about 7:34 AM PDT

I'm fighting the down feeling today. I'm not sure why I'm feeling down, but I'm feeling that way. There could be several reason's I'm feeling that way, none of which I'm ready to list at this time. The problem is I can thank of too many reasons I'm down. It doesn't do any good to list them, because when I do that the list becomes endless. This morning I can't deal with an endless list of depressing items.

I find that if I write about the darkness then sometimes it goes away; that's why I have an off line journal called Writing My Spiritual Journey. However, this morning I've already made an entry in that journal, so I'm not going to make another entry until after I've completed all the writing goals or assignments for July 7, 2008. That's why I'm writing about being depressed in this entry. I usually don't write about being down in this blog.

Another thing I do when I'm feeling down is say prayers. I pray every day, of course, but when I'm down I make a special effort to say specific prayers. Most of the prayers are reveal by Baha'u'llah or The Bab, however, there is one prayer written by 'Abdu'l-Baha that I say. The prayer by 'Abdu'l-Baha has to do with laying everything in God's hand.

Prayer helps me when I'm down. Writing helps me when I'm down. Perhaps that's what I need to do. I need to list everything that helps when I'm down. Instead of listing an endless group of unhappiness, I need to list the things that give me happiness. I hadn't thought of that before, but that's why I make journal entries when I'm down. Writing helps me think. Writing changes my mood. Writing helps me focus. Writing, like prayer, assist in transformation or at least it does for me. Writing assist me to see where I need to change and the areas that need the most work.