Istiqlál (Independence), 10 ‘Ilm (Knowledge), 170 BE - Friday, October 25, 2013 about 5:43 AM Pacific Time
It is the last Friday in October 2013 and it is the last October I will spend in this house. I am looking forward to moving, which is an event filled with both joy and tears. I am sad to be leaving a house Mom and I enjoyed living in. I am happy to be downsizing my life by moving into a smaller place.
I am moving to a smaller place that will be easier for me to keep clean. I am looking forward to making new friends and getting involved in new activities. I am looking forward to re-involving myself in some old activities I enjoyed with Mom. I am looking forward to making new memories and writing poems or stories about the old memories.
I am looking forward to moving someplace where I do not wake up in the middle of the night listening for the oxygen concentrator. Mom died on November 29, 2012, almost eleven months ago, I still wake up in the middle of the night listening for the noise of the oxygen concentrator. I still wake up thinking I hear Mom calling me and then realize it was only a dream. Perhaps in the new place I can sleep through the night without waking up listening for those sounds.
The old sounds still haunt
this house, its bedrooms and hall,
wake me at midnight.
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