Tuesday Rant from Las Vegas

It's a beautiful and chilly Tuesday in Las Vegas. This morning I went to my kidney doctor for a blood test because I have an appointment to see him next week. I'm not looking forward to the appointment because it's going to cost me a co-pay for the visit. The co-pay is only about  $10.00 so I don't suppose I have anything to bitch about. It wouldn't do any good to bitch anyway. I have to see the doctor so I have to pay the co-pay. 

I didn't have to worry about co-pays last year because Medcaid paid them last year, but they won't this year so I have to figure out where that money coming from plus every other medical expense that I can't afford to pay because I'm attempting to survive on Medicare and Social Security. January is an especially difficult month financially because I have to have my car tag renewed. I know I'll survive, but I don't know how right now. 

I think my biggest problem today is that I'm so tired of worrying and scratching to find the money to purchase what I need. The biggest thing I need is a vacation and that's not going to happen because in order to take a vacation I need money which I don't have and if I did have it would go to paying bills. Then this morning I received a letter about my Student Loan, which I can't afford to pay and still have a place to live, was delinquent. I'm not stupid, I know the damn thing's delinquent. If I could afford to pay it I would. I'm barely surviving on a fixed income. 

I don't know why I'm writing this because it's not going to do any good. In addition, I'll probably regret writing it, but today I don't care. If I thought tears would do any good then I'd cry, but crying won't change anything or do anything about my problems. Crying may help me emotionally. However, instead of crying I think I'll say some prayers.