Endings are always depressing

Fiḍál (Grace), 4 Ayyám-i-Há (The Days of Há), 173 BE - Tuesday, February 28, 2017 CE about 9:57 AM Pacific Standard Time 

Ending are always depressing, 

Saying good-bye 

To a month, 

A person 

Or anything 

Brings tears to my eyes. 

Today is the last day of Ayyám-i-Há for another year. It ends at sunset and the month of ‘Alá’ (Loftiness) begins which Is the month of the Fast. In addition a new Gregorian month begins. My mother was born on March 19 in 1921 this year she would have been 96 years old. This year March 20 is the vernal equinox which is Naw-Ruz. Naw-Ruz means New Day and it is the New Year I celebrate. 

As I think about saying good-bye to an old year, I wonder what other endings will occur in over the next nineteen days. I wonder if all the endings I encounter in March will be sad. I hope not because endings are usually beginnings and beginnings should not be sad. 

 

At the beginning of a New Week

Jamál (Beauty), 17 Mulk (Dominion), 170 BE - Sunday, February 23, 2014 about 9:35 am Pacific Standard Time

It's Sunday again, a day that reoccurs every seven days on schedule and without any huge announcement. Ayyám-i-Há begins on the evening of Tuesday, February 25 and ends on the evening of Saturday, March 1. At that time ‘Alá’ (Loftiness) begins and last for the next 19 days until the evening of March 20, which the year 170 BE comes to an end. On Naw-Ruz (March 21) a New Year begins, it will be the year 171 BE.

Today, Sunday, February 23, I begin a new pen and paper journal along with my new week. I realized, as I was sipping my coffee, that this also marks the true beginning of my New Normal, which I though begin on January 1, 2013. The truth is that my new normal begin when I moved out of the house my mother and I shared. I'm living in my own apartment and it's frightening because taking care of only myself is much more difficult then taking care of someone else.

I'm responsible for everything and not just material resources. I have to make myself get up in the morning with no one for me to get up except myself. I have to get out and go to the laundromat at least once a week. I have to attempt to shop for one  person instead of two, when everything is geared toward families of three or more. I have to... there isn't any sense in going on with that thought because I have to do everything myself.

Today I start a new pen and paper journal, I think I'm going to experiment with the entries. I want to make each entry interesting and slightly different from the last. This means that one day I may write a letter and the next a poem or I may write letters to a different person each day.  I know one thing I have to do right now and that's to fix me something to eat.

Happy Ayyám-I-Há

This is a leap year, so there are five days in Ayyám-I-Há. The first is today, Sunday, February 26, 2012, and the last day is Thursday, March 1, 2012. There are five days of gift giving, hospitality, charity, and preparing for the nineteen day Fast. Baha’u’llah revealed a prayer for Ayyám-I-Há or Intercalary Days.

A Long Weary Day

Jamál (Beauty), 3 Ayyám-I-Há (Intercalary Days), 166 BE – Saturday, February 27, 2010 about 7:10 PM Pacific Time

It's been a long weary day. I'm tired, but not physically tired. I think the clouds have something to do with the way I feel today. I saw a sliver of blue earlier today, but then the clouds covered it.

I went to an Ayyám-I-Há Party last night at the Baha'i Center. Mom didn't go because she wasn't feeling well. I think it was something she ate, but I haven't figured out what it was.

This morning I picked up a couple of boxes of food, while Mom remained home and slept. Mom doesn't sleep well at night so I let her sleep this morning. She felt better when she got and after eating a little breakfast.

Happy Ayyám-I-Há

The Second Day of Ayyám-I-Há

Istiqlál (Independence), 2 Ayyám-I-Há (Intercalary), 165 BE – Friday, February 27, 2009 about 6:11 AM Pacific Time

It's day two of Ayyám-I-Há 165 BE and I am cleaning out one of the folder in my yahoo e-mail box. I removing old e-mail in the freecycle folder. There is quite a few old messages in that folder because I didn't check that e-mail folder for a couple of months or so. I have to get that folder completed emptied before I offer anything on freecycle this month or next month.

I have some books and other items to offer on freecycle. I will offer them, then if no one picks them up within a week I will donate the books to the library. The other items I'm not sure what to do with except the cloths. The cloths I can take to the women's shelter. The other things will have to go somewhere besides the trash, but I have no idea where to take them as yet.

I'm going to start cleaning the third bedroom in the house out after March 1 and I am going to have to find someone who wants the stuff Mom and I don't use any more. There is no use throwing something away when someone else can use it. My grandparents recycled everything they could. I'm getting to the point where I'm recycling as much as I can.